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Hench-Sized Comic Book Reviews – 6/1/19

This was the week that DC Comics upended their entire comics line with a bunch of stuff! Doomsday Clock! The Last Knight on Earth! Leviathan Rising! And I read none of it. I wonder if that makes me a bad comic book fan…

I did read a bunch of other relatively enjoyable comics — though the latest and last issue of X-23 has made an enemy for life. Beyond that, the Comic Book of the Week was the new issue of Giant-Man! Leah Williams is doing everything right in my eyes in all of her comics.

Giants Mission Sucks 01

Not all superheroics are glamorous

Meanwhile, speaking of Leah Williams, X-Tremists had another strong issue as it starts to delve into the erasure of homosexual feelings in the Age of X-Man…Except that I guess the whole overall world starts to fall apart at the end of the issue, so this whole crossover is coming to an end before Leah Williams will get much of a chance to really play in the space. I know Jonathan Hickman is coming back to remake the X-Men from top to bottom, but surely Marvel can make room for a Leah Williams’ solo Blob comic…

Comic Reviews: Giant-Man #2, Heroes in Crisis #9, Magnificent Ms. Marvel #3 and X-23 #12. 

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The Worst Thing to Ever Happen in Comics Has Just Happened

I don’t even know if I have the guts to share this with you good people. It has rocked me to my core. I realize that comic books are an always-changing landscape, that the only constant is change. But this new change in the last issue of X-23 is something I cannot abide.

Gabby has changed her name from “Honey Badger” to “Scout”.

Honey Badger Gone 01

Is nothing sacred anymore? Does nothing matter? Have we not souls? Why has Marvel Comics forsaken us like this?

Gabby is a great character, full of fun energy and youthful spirit. And as a clone twice removed from Wolverine, when she was given the name “Honey Badger”, it was like the clouds parted and all was right with the world. It was the most perfectly crafted codename in the history of comic books. It was like we didn’t even know a part of Gabby was missing when we read her adventures in All-New Wolverine, and then the name was revealed and it fit so perfectly that all was right with the world.

But now she’s abandoning that name in favorite of “Scout” and I want to cry out to the uncaring Heavens that we have been forsaken. Scout?! Are you kidding me? What a stupid and boring name! It’s worse than Laura switching from Wolverine back to X-23. Scout?! It doesn’t mean anything!!

What’s even worse is that this change comes at the very end of the very last issue of the current X-23 comic. It’s been a relatively fun comic these past 12 issues, but I assume it’s being cancelled for a reason. So it’s not like “Scout” is going to even use her new name. Can you not just accept cancellation with some dignity? Must you claw and scratch at every good thing on your way out, scarring something beautiful before you go?

This is like graffiti on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. As if someone had knocked the head off the statue of David.

Why don’t we just set the Mona Lisa on fire while we’re at it?

Scout?! What the fuck.

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Hench-Sized Comic Book Reviews – 4/13/19

Comic release schedules have morphed into a weird track for me. How is it that all of my current favorite comics come out in the exact same week, forced to battle it out for Comic Book of the Week? Nearly any of the comics I read this week could have trounced some of the garbage I read other weeks.

As much as I’ve been loving Wonder Twins — and this week saw another stellar issue — an old champion has revealed it still has legs and comedy chops! Unbeatable Squirrel Girl wins Comic Book of the Week for a really fun and funny tie-in to War of the Realms!

Squirrel Girl War 01

Russell Dauterman, eat your heart out!

Meanwhile, the new issue of Batman featured interior art by Amanda Conner, one of my favorite comic book artist of all time. I’m quite pleased with the issue, which sees the bachelor party of Catwoman, wherein she and Lois Lane party at the Fortress of Solitude. Unfortunately, I did not review the issue because Batman remains trapped in a weird dream prison thing, so I’m finding each individual issue difficult to grade. Fun stuff, though.

Comic Book Reviews: Go Go Power Rangers #19, Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #43, Unstoppable Wasp #6, Wonder Twins #3 and X-23 #11.

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Hench-Sized Comic Book Reviews – 2/9/19

Woohoo! Good news everybody, The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part is awesome! Maybe not as surprisingly magical as the first film, but no less funny, touching, colorful and just plain fun. I need more comics to be exactly like the LEGO movies.

Instead, we get comics that are fun in their own rights, like Champions, X-23 and Young Justice. Comic Book of the Week goes to another stellar issue of The Green Lantern, a comic that is definitely living up to the hype.

GL Chooses Life 01

Spoken like a true wildcard

Meanwhile, I read the first proper issue of the Age of X-Man and it was fine. It was about the basic X-Men team and it was about what I expected. The twist of the universe has already been revealed, and we know these are our regular main characters living in a made-up fantasy. So there’s no real sense of permanence and stakes, as far as I’m concerned. They’ll tell whatever story they need to tell, and then we’ll move on.

Comic Reviews: Champions #2, The Green Lantern #4, Tony Stark – Iron Man #8, Uncanny X-Men #11, X-23 #9 and Young Justice #2.

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X-Cow is Probably Dead

X-Cow is the mutant cow that writer Mariko Tamaki created as a background joke in one of her X-23 issues. Or maybe it was artist Juann Cabal who slipped her into a background of a panel. I don’t know, but I thought it was funny!

Then X-Cow went and returned to the pages of X-23 this week! And she’s a Dungeon Master!

XCow 02

Oh Anole, what hath you wrought?!

Neat!

I’m glad to see that X-Cow’s mutation has not stopped her from having hobbies and making friends!

What has stopped her, though, is the fact that she’s probably dead.

As we learned in the new issue of Uncanny X-Men this week, most mutants have either been killed, locked up, deported or disappeared.

XCow 03

Why couldn’t X-Cow have gone to the Age of X-Man?

I can’t imagine anything good happened to X-Cow now that the entire world has turned against mutants to such a wild degree. That might have been the last game of Dungeons & Dragons she ever played…

Apologies for assuming X-Cow’s gender.

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