I don’t know this for a fact, but it’s the only conclusion to draw from the latest comic book solicitations: Marvel is going to kill Strong Guy in the June issue of New Mutants.

That’s the cover. Here’s the solicitation blurb:

• FUNERAL FOR A NEW MUTANT!
• Following the tragic events of last issue, THE NEW MUTANTS come together to bury one of their own.
• Can the team put aside their differences long enough to avenge their fallen teammate, or will this loss tear them apart?
• Featuring guest appearances by all your favorite X-MEN characters as they come to say goodbye… Or do they?

So somebody is going to die in an upcoming issue of New Mutants. There are only five members on the team: Strong Guy, Magik, Boom Boom, Rictor and Wolfsbane. Theoretically, any of them could die, but let’s look at the evidence.

On the cover, the skeletons of all the characters are in action poses — except for Strong Guy, who appears to be falling backwards. That’s a pretty big clue.

The second and most important factor is that I like Strong Guy, so of course he’s going to be the one to die. Remember, June is the month when the new Multiple Man comic is going to debut. I’m super excited about that.

But of course, in the same month where Multiple Man returns, his best friend, Strong Guy, has to die. That’s how the universe balances my comic fandom. I’m not allowed to have nice things. Even when the same writer is writing both the Multiple Man comic and New Mutants, and could bring together their reunion. That’s not going to happen.

Within a week of revealing Multiple Man was coming back from the dead, Marvel killed Phil Urich.

I am not allowed to have  nice things in comics!

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