Category Archives: Comics
Review: Justice League #1
The future of comic books is here! Or at least that’s what DC Comics would like you to believe. So far, I’m not convinced.
Justice League #1
Today marked the release of Justice League #1, their launching point for a whole line-wide revamp of their most popular characters. This comic has been hyped up the wazoo all Summer long. It’s reportedly had more than 200,000 orders. Justice League was the only comic book that DC put out this week (sort of) in order to ensure that every comic fan worth their collection would get in on the ground floor of their exciting and bombastic new stories!
The comic fails. Not terribly so. But this is a real stumble out of the starting gate.
Justice League #1 feels like one of those extended house ads they staple into the middle of normal comics. Where Superman and/or Green Lantern help some kids wearing Subway brand T-shirts defeat some bad guys with the power of Subway sandwiches. It looks like Green Lantern. It acts like Green Lantern. But it doesn’t feel like Green Lantern.
Instead it feels like a rushed, overly thought-out promotional piece. What’s supposed to be the iconic first meeting of Batman and Green Lantern speeds through its dialogue and its team-up, with the two of them trading not-so-snappy banter as they try and fight some random, monstrous-looking villain. But the writer, Geoff Johns, seems to think that the banter is very snappy. That’s why it feels overly thought-out.
Justice League #1 doesn’t feel new or special. It’s just another comic about Batman and Green Lantern.
At least this first issue of Justice League has some cool action, some strong characterization and some fantastic art. When I say this comic fails, I mostly mean that it fails as the kick-off to the new DC Comics Universe. I was looking forward to reading a clean, complication-free introduction to the Justice League kicking ass and taking names. What I got instead was a comic where Batman and Green Lantern hang out and trade forced dialogue about the ‘newness’ of this world. Barely anyone else appears in the comic, despite the cover featuring seven heroes. No sign of Wonder Woman, Aquaman or Flash. And Batman and Green Lantern are an odd – yet obvious – choice to introduce us to the new DC Universe.
This was not what I was expecting and I am disappointed. Though I’ll keep buying, because it looks like they’re going to try and build up to greatness instead of wowing us from the start – which is what they should have done.
Some call it bickering, some call it bantering; I call it forced
Justice League #1 takes place towards the dawn of the superhero age, which occurred ‘5 Years Ago’ in comic book time. None of the heroes have met one another. They don’t know each other’s secret identities. So this first storyline in Justice League is going to let us tag along as they meet each other and start to work together against a greater threat. There are several scenes in this issue where the ‘newness’ of it all is thrown at us. For example, Green Lantern is shocked when he finds out that Batman is just a man in a costume and doesn’t have any bat-powers. The cops are also openly trying to shoot the heroes, placing them firmly on the opposite side of the law for now.
But for all this freshness, no one seems bothered at all that the villain suddenly transforms into a giant, mechanical, alien-looking spider monster. It’s just business as usual.
And that, I think, is my main complaint about this comic, one that is felt in both the writing and the art: this doesn’t feel new.
The costumes, powers and personalities remain the same for Batman and Green Lantern. So what if the cops are shooting at them? That’s not a big enough change. Why couldn’t this comic work as the first meeting between these heroes in the old DC Univers? There’s nothing that makes it feel like it’s this new world with new histories and background. Heck, for Batman and Green Lantern, they don’t even have new histories or background. More on that later. The heroes look and act the same as they always have. They’re fighting a similar villain to what they’ve always fought.
The art reinforces this idea.
Jim Lee is, without a doubt, one of the most popular artists in comic books. His characters are dynamic and detailed, his action scenes are exciting and he draws some pretty awesome Green Lantern ring-constructs. His Batman is one of the reasons I started reading DC comics back in college. I was reading a few Robin issues, and Batman was right in the middle of a big storyline entitled Hush, about a new villain. Jim Lee was drawing every issue for a whole year. The art was beautiful.
Click to enlarge - It's worth it
But that’s the problem, I’m very familiar with Jim Lee’s artwork! As are most comic book fans. So when we draws these supposedly ‘new’ versions of Batman and Green Lantern, they look just like the old versions. Of course it makes perfect sense to put your most popular artist on this very important issue, but all it does is remind us of the old stories. This issue should be making us look to the future, not have us reminiscing about the past. Minor spoiler, the cliffhanger character appears on the cover. Surprise!
So Justice League #1 fails as an introductory issue to both the team and the new DC Universe. We get a nice, if incomplete, introduction to Green Lantern and Batman, but they could very well just be the same characters from the old DC Universe. Nothing in this issue screams new or exciting.
Hopefully issue #2 can make up for some of these shortcomings. The problem is that it won’t come out until October. Between now and then, there are 51 other brand new series coming out. All those new #1 issues, surely some of them are going to be more exciting and memorable than this issue.
Which shouldn’t be the case. Nothing should be bigger or more bombastic than the Justice League. Oh well.
The eventual full lineup of the new Justice League
That’s my review of the issue, but maybe you’re interested in a little background for any readers who have no idea what I’m talking about. What’s this revamp, you ask? I’m going to assume that you have a passing knowledge of the iconic superheroes: Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, etc. They are all from DC Comics, one of the two main comic book companies. Their competitor, Marvel Comics, has Spider-Man, Captain America, and the X-Men in their stable of heroes. Both companies have been publishing comics about these heroes since at least the 60s, sometimes even longer. Batman and Superman have been around since the 30s!
But all those years of stories and all of that continuity add up! Comic fans want their heroes to learn lessons that carry over into the next issues, to grow and change. But new readers might be afraid to pick up a new comic because they think they have to know 30+ years of comic book history to understand what’s going on. Someone new to comics might not want to pick up Superman #662 because they haven’t read the 661 issues that came before.
Both publishers are aware of this problem and take steps to make comics more accessible. Well this Fall, DC Comics is taking an extreme step to make their comics more new reader friendly. They are doing a line-wide reboot of their titles, starting over with new #1 issues and stripping away all that cluttered up continuity. The characters are staying the same, for the most part. Superman will still be Superman. He just won’t have the same baggage that he’s had for the past few decades.
But DC isn’t going for a full clean slate. They’re not starting over from the ground floor. Some characters will have a few minor tweaks, some characters will be rebooted entirely, and some characters won’t change at all. Which brings us back to Batman and Green Lantern and why they are an odd -yet obvious – choice to be the stars of Justice League #1.
Their new 'first' meeting
In part, this reboot is due to low sales. DC has always trailed behind Marvel. DC’s two most popular comics are from the Batman and Green Lantern franchises. So it makes sense that the first issue of this reboot would star their most popular and profitable characters. However, Batman and Green Lantern have not been revamped at all. The stories and characters from before the revamp will be carrying over into the revamp. Nothing is changing. At least nothing major. So I find it odd that they will introduce us to the new DC Universe considering they will remain exactly as they were in the old DC Universe.
At least this new issue gives writer Geoff Johns a chance to flesh out their characterization.
Though their dialogue sucks and feels very forced, Green Lantern is charmingly cocky and Batman is quietly stoic. We can really get at the heart of their personalities, which should be fun as the series continues. Hal is supremely confident in his Green Lantern powers. Whereas Batman doesn’t give a shit about the fancy glowing hero, Batman just wants to get the job done. They’re both tracking a vaguely monstrous villain in Gotham City, one who works for the big bad guy, but we don’t see that super-villain yet.
To set the stage, DC’s revamp involves cramming all of their important continuity down to a 5 year span. In this new DC Universe, superheroes have only been around for five years. They’re fresh and exciting, but people aren’t sure they can trust them just yet.
That's Cyborg on the right, but he isn't a superhero yet
It’s an interesting take on superheroes and the public. Not new, but it could be a good read with such iconic heroes. Supposedly the new Superman is going to be more alien in nature, and he won’t be the beloved hero. We’ll see how that goes.
In the end, I’m excited for the reboot but disappointed in the first issue. But DC has plenty of chances to win me back!
A Little DC Rejiggering Intro for You
This is a parody trailer for the new DC Comics reboot. It’ll help you non-comics reading fans get up to speed while I write my Justice League #1 review.
Review: Punisher #2
With the second issue of the new series, writer Greg Rucka continues his tale of the wraith-like, silent Punisher and the investigation into the wedding massacre. Once again our focus is on NYPD detectives Celmons and Bolt, split with the continuing adventures of the killer, who is being stalked by the Punisher. We get a peek at the people behind the massacre (I think), but we’re no closer to discovering why everybody at the wedding had to die. Still, the series is rich, dark and fun to read.
Punisher #2
Until they blow the cliffhanger with a frankly silly new addition to the story!
But more on that later. For now, let’s start with the Punisher. Once again, Rucka gives us a Frank Castle who doesn’t say a word and doesn’t have an inch of internal monologue. Though no longer as spectral, thanks to the art, he still doesn’t say anything. The Punisher goes about his killing in utter silence, and there’s a lot of killing this issue. But I’m already getting tired of the silent act. The supporting characters are good so far, at least the detectives are. But I want to read about Frank Castle, not a bunch of nobodies.
Hopefully the villain they inject into the cliffhanger will at least get the Punisher to speak next issue. If only it wasn’t such a lame villain.
We start off following the killer from the first issue, the goateed guy who gunned down people at the wedding but survived the Punisher’s club massacre at the end of issue #1. This guy is running like hell through the streets of New York, trying to go to ground. But nobody’s willing to put him up. So he just keeps running through the dark, grimy streets of New York City. We’re treated to narration by two people named Stephanie and Christian, who we see a bit later standing on a rooftop with a group of other people. They’re dressed like rich people and are talking about the killer, and how the only reason the Punisher let him live is to track him, which would lead the Punisher to Christian and Stephanie.
And sure enough, that’s exactly what Frank Castle is doing. Though still in the shadows, Punisher is now drawn in such a way that we can clearly see his face. He’s no longer a stealthy ninja, as in the first half of the first issue. You may remember that issue #1 was split into two parts. In the first part, Punisher only appeared in shadow. In the second part, he was in the light. In this issue, all one story, he’s in the light again.
Because of my love of the Garth Ennis Punisher series, in which Frank Castle was a hard man pushing 50 with a lot of years on him, I’m not a fan of this young, handsome Punisher. But it’s not a big deal.
Handsome chap
Stephanie and Christian aren’t worried because they’ve hired someone to take care of the Punisher. We see this person only in shadows for now, and he has claws and glowing red eyes. Someone badass perhaps? Just you wait and see!
We jump to the daytime, with detectives Clemons and Bolt investigating the club massacre that ended the first issue. Oscar “Ozzy” Clemons is the Morgan Freeman guy, and he’s convinced that the Punisher is responsible. The kills are far too clean, far too precise. That’s Special Forces training right there. So now they’ve got the Punisher to deal with, messing up their case. They’ve got a job to do, doesn’t the Punisher understand that?
Speaking of jobs to do, in comes Norah Winters, a reporter for the Daily Bugle and a supporting character from Amazing Spider-Man. Now this was a fun cameo. One aspect of this Punisher series is that it’s firmly set in the Marvel Universe, complete with superheroes and mutants and whatnot. So it’s smart that, instead of making up some random reporter, Rucka just borrows an existing reporter character from Amazing Spider-Man. Norah’s fun and sassy in this issue, and has clearly worked with Clemons before. Unfortunately, their entire conversation is about Norah and we don’t really learn anything new about Clemons or Bolt. It’s an extended explanation into who she is and what she does. Hopefully that means she’ll be making routine appearance in this comic.
Being a newspaper reporter myself, having one as a character is always a hoot.
Young, perky and blonde; what's not to love?
Let’s stop here for a moment and look at that picture I just posted. This is a pet peeve that’s only going to bother someone like me, who is a crime reporter for a newspaper in real life. Just like most jobs, Hollywood and other media tend to exaggerate a reporter’s job. I realize that Norah is supposed to be a sassy and edgy reporter, but she’s all over the place in this issue. I realize she may just be joking with her friend Clemons, but when a homicide detective tells you that you can’t quote him on the details of a murder investigation, you don’t quote him on the details of a murder investigation. You have to maintain sources as a reporter, and to do that you have to maintain their respect. If they tell you something ‘off the record’ and tell you not to quote them, you don’t do it. That tends to piss them off. Bad enough she snuck past the police tape into an active crime scene.
Honestly though, I’m probably just being silly. It’s comics, not real life. And my dinky little city isn’t New York City, so maybe it’s different there. Still, it’s one of those things that will only make someone in my specific circumstance stop and shake his head.
This scene is awesome, though, because it name drops Phil Urich. Longtime readers of my blog will know that Phil Urich was one of My 6 Favorite Comic Book Characters. His current comics status quo is that he’s a cameraman for the Daily Bugle, who is making some cash and fame by filming himself as the villainous Hobgoblin and selling it to the Daily Bugle. Exactly like Peter Parker did when he took pictures of Spider-Man. So it’s awesome that Phil gets a mention in a Punisher comic. It means Marvel is really pushing him as a character that will stick around. What’s silly, though, is that Phil is being treated like a TV cameraman. They say that Phil is filming Norah doing her reports. I know the Daily Bugle is mostly an online newspaper now in comics, but do they really do more video than newspaper reporting? Norah can easily make the leap from anchorperson to writing reporter? Those are two rather different fields, especially when it’s clear that Norah prefers the writing.
Kind of an odd sort of crossing of wires in terms of what the Daily Bugle is doing these days. Still, woot Phil Urich!
But I digress. Back to the Punisher!
After the extended introduction to Norah, we jump back to the Punisher chasing the goateed killer. His name is Liam, by the way, and he’s found a brothel to hide in. The owner kicks him out on the street, tossing him into the gutter. Oops! Punisher’s right there, right outside! Liam scrambles to his feet and keeps running, while the Punisher decides to pay the brothel a visit. In silent fashion, Punisher lets himself in and starts blowing away the druggies and the gang-bangers – but he doesn’t harm the girls. Punisher doesn’t kill prostitutes, especially ones that are hooked on drugs like these girls. But he does kill the owner, even when the guy tried to take a hostage, and he kills the ‘madame’, who was using drugs to keep the girls in line.
The blood will wash right out, the punishment will last forever!
The art in this scene is clear and easy to follow, if a little scattershot. The panels are not square and gridlike, with a few experimental angles. What works great are the colors. The scenes on the street with Liam are blue and black, while inside the brothel we switch to a fuchsia. The rooms are bathed in fuchsia, and soon blood. The Punisher’s kills are sharp and bloody. One is especially cool when they just show the silhouette of the owner (in fuchsia, not black) and he’s got the detailed, bloody bullet hole in his head. Punisher leaves and the drugged out girls in the brothel are free. I guess.
We jump back to Clemons and Bolt, who have gone to visit the bride in the hospital. She’s practically the only survivor of the wedding massacre, and she’s finally woken up. It’s a quiet, soft scene in which she tries to remember what happened. Then she remembers everything…
A brilliantly silent page
In the end, Liam has made it back to his bosses, though not Christian and Stephanie from earlier, just some other people who were working with Christian and Stephanie. One of them is a pretty redhead named Dove. She kills Liam with a shotgun, and the Punisher watches from afar through the scope of his sniper rifle. Once Liam is dead, Dove turns to look up Punisher’s scope to tell him that she knows he’s there and she’s ready for him.
Enter cliffhanger villain…the new Vulture!
Are you KIDDING ME!??
What is this crap!? This character is a guy named Jimmy Natale, who used to be a mafia ‘cleaner’. But then the mob turned him into a murderous bird monster-man who now wants to get his revenge on mobsters, or something. Sometimes he works for the bad guys. He fought Spider-Man a few times as some kind of vicious freak. He has no connection to the classic Vulture though, nor to the Punisher. He’s just some monstrous new take on the classic villain created during the period when Marvel wanted to give Spider-Man some new villains to fight. But the point I’m trying to make is that this is the lamest, one-note, bottom-dwelling super-villain that they could possibly throw at the Punisher. They build up this hidden, surprise super-villain…and it’s the new Vulture?
What a chump!
I can only hope they needed to find some bargain bin super-villain for the Punisher to kill. For you see, that’s the problem with bringing the Punisher into the normal Marvel Universe. If you want to have him go up against costumed super-villains, he’s going to want to kill those super-villains. That’s why Garth Ennis’ Punisher took place in its own separate world. And why when they brought Punisher back to the Marvel Universe during Civil War, he almost immediately killed Stilt-Man.
R.I.P.
So I guess Marvel’s just throwing out some lame super-villain who, in theory, will be able to put up a fight. The character of the new Vulture is that he’s vicious and monstrous. So it could very well be a brutal battle in issue #3. I’m sure he’ll definitely give the human Frank Castle some problems. He’s just a laaaaaame villain.
All-in-all, it’s a good second issue. The story continues along on both fronts, though not very far, I’m afraid. We meet the bride who survived, and we meet the people who were behind Liam and the killers. So the story is moving. Unfortunately, we don’t get to really know anything more about the protagonists. Punisher remains silent, ‘speaking’ only with his guns. He kills and moves on, as the Punisher does. He continues to be badass, but this silent treatment isn’t going to be as much fun if it continues much longer. Detectives Clemons and Bolt are back, but their character development is brushed aside so that we can be introduced to Norah Winters.
While it’ll be fun to have Norah in the book, if she sticks around, we didn’t really get to know anything more about the two detectives, who we know will be the main protagonists. Bolt, especially, was in the background this issue, while he was the main character in the last issue. So while the story may have progressed, the characters did not.
At least the art was once again phenomenal. The right mix of action and gritty, street-level talking heads. I love realistic art in my comics, as opposed to silly superhero fantasy, so I’m enjoying the art. This is definitely a book to keep reading. I’m going to try to keep going with every issue, since I’ve had the luxury of starting with issue #1.
What do you all think? Should I keep reviewing the Punisher?
Superman Has No Underpants!!
This just in from the world of superhero journalism, beloved hero Superman is not wearing any underpants. At least he won’t be in both the upcoming movie, Man of Steel, and the new DC rejiggering this September. The hearts of Internet fanboys everywhere are all a flutter at the prospect that Superman will no longer be wearing his classic, traditional red trunks over the top of his blue costume. You’ve heard all the jokes in the world about how superheroes wear their underwear outside of their pants, well Superman is saying, “No more!”
And I don’t particularly care.
DC is in the process of rebooting Superman so that he can appeal to a wider audience…I guess. I don’t really know what DC’s plan is for Superman, or at least the reasoning behind it. Superman is freaking Superman! Everybody knows him. How wider of an audience can you get? But in the comics, he’s no longer going to be married to Lois Lane, he’s going to be more of an outsider and he’s going to get a new costume. A costume without the underpants on the outside.
Shazam!
First of all, it should be noted that ‘underpants’ is a hilarious word. I vote that it replace ‘underwear’ as the preferred word.
Second of all, this isn’t a big deal in both directions. Nobody cared that Superman, like a lot of superheroes, had briefs on the outside of his costume. And nobody should care that DC is going with a new look. It doesn’t change anything about Superman except for the color of his pelvis. Yes, Superman is very iconic. VH1 did a list of the 200 greatest pop culture icons, and Superman was #2! Oprah was #1. Not even Superman is greater than Oprah (though I beg to differ). But his iconic status has nothing to do with his pelvis. His costume as a whole, sure, but give it a few months and I’m sure nobody will even notice the difference.
But Internet people are the world are up in arms. I’d link to some articles, but I don’t really want to call anybody out. There have been a few candid set pics of the Man of Steel movie released, and there too he’s not wearing the briefs.
I once did an entry saying I hate these types of photos. Damn me!
But it’s not a big deal, in my opinion. Granted, Superman is far from my favorite character, but I still don’t think even Superfans should be worried. At the very least, let’s wait and see what DC does with the character before anybody gets up in arms about his costume. It’s still the iconic red, blue and yellow Superman costume. They just tweaked it a little. Perhaps DC wanted to get away from that joke about underwear on the outside. Mother Goose and Grimm can be brutal.
Oh the humanity!
Fun Fact: Did you know that superheroes wearing their briefs on the outside was taken from old circus strongmen from the turn of the century? They’re the sort of briefs that professional wrestlers now where. It’s not just a silly, cosmetic thing. They actually wore those briefs for a reason. And now you know.
The Next 6 Movies that Marvel Comics Should Make
Earlier this month, it was reported on the nerd blogosphere that Marvel was preparing a Dr. Strange script and had a short list of directors in mind for a possible 2013 release. That’s pretty cool news. I didn’t do a post on it because it’s only a rumor, and I’ll wait for the actual announcement. But it gave me the idea to do a list of what Marvel Comics characters deserve a movie once we reach The Avengers in 2012.
Because what is Marvel goes to do after The Avengers?
Obviously, sequels are the first answer, with Iron Man 3 and Thor 2 also already scheduled for 2013. But Marvel is always talking about what other characters they can make into movies. Blade, for example, is as obscure a character as one can get, but his badass movie all those years ago is what kicked off this past decade of awesome superhero movies. And along with Dr. Strange, they’ve also got people working on a script for Ant-Man (specifically Edgar Wright, the guy who made Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz and Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, so yay!) Deadpool and possibly even Guardians of the Galaxy are also being suggested.
There are no bad characters, only bad filmmakers. So who else deserves the movie treatment in a post-Avengers world?
6. X-Factor
Multiple Man makes another appearance in my blog
Premise: Not all mutants want to put on costumes and play superhero with the X-Men. Some just want to live normal lives working normal jobs, even if they’re not normal. Enter Jamie Madrox, the Multiple Man. Along with his pals Guido “Strong Guy” Carosella and Rahne “Wolfsbane” Sinclair, they’ve opened a private detective agency in the heart of New York City. Based in Mutant Town, the Big Apple ghetto for mutants, the trio at X-Factor look under any rock and snoop around any corner to help their clients.
Why it would make a good movie: This is probably my most fanboyish choice. Fans of this site may already know that X-Factor star Jamie Madrox is my all-time favorite comic book character. I don’t necessarily think this could succeed as a movie, but it would still be awesome. When Madrox first opened his detective agency in the comics, the writer played up the noir aspects of the story. Like classic film noir detectives, Madrox had to deal with chilling mysteries, shady characters and bewitching women. While I’ve never really seen any classic film noir movies, the detective genre still has very strong legs at the theater.
So why not add super powers?
This will probably become a theme on this list: mixing superheroes into other movie genres. The origin tale and the superhero genre are already played out at the theaters. Nobody wants another by-the-numbers hero flick like Green Lantern. So if Marvel is going to try to dip into other characters, they should get creative. Madrox is a funny and charming lead, with a super power that isn’t over-the-top. Yes, he already appeared in the X-Men films, but so what? A little creative writing can get around that paradox. X-Factor would be a unique and exciting new chapter in the already massive and successful X-Men franchise.
5. Wasp – Make her a Disney Princess!
She’s already starring in the Avengers cartoon show
The Premise: Janet Van Dyne’s super power is to shrink to the size of a bug and fly around on little wasp wings. Not a super power that makes villains quake. Yet she’s always been a prominent member of the Avengers, Earth’s Mightiest Heroes! Because this pint-sized pixie princess is ready to prove to the world that she’s just as strong as the boys! When the world is threatened and the likes of Captain America, Iron Man and the Hulk are defeated, it’s up to the miniature Wasp to prove that big things come in small packages!
Why it would make a good movie: Just look at that last line I wrote! That’s Disney Princess gold right there. If you didn’t know this, Disney now owns Marvel. They bought Marvel last year, I believe. Disney hasn’t done much to pierce Marvel’s production, and they promised they wouldn’t, but it’s about time we get some cross-pollination. Marvel has few female characters who can stand on their own. Most of the prominent superheroines are either derivatives of a male hero (She-Hulk) or are mired down in too much continuity (Scarlet Witch).
Whereas the Wasp can stand on her own! Sure she has a boyfriend/husband in Giant-Man, but all good Disney movies need a love interest. There are few properties hotter than Disney Princesses. Just think of what it could do to get young girls into comics. It’s an utterly perfect way to blend Marvel and Disney, and I think Wasp could carry her own full-length animated film, followed by dozens of straight-to-DVD sequels. Because that’s the Disney way!
4. Cage
He has more street cred than 50 Cent
Premise: The Harlem born and raised Luke Cage underwent an experiment in prison where he received super strength and skin as hard as steel. Under the name Power Man, he set out on the streets of New York to make the world a better place. Nowadays he just goes by Luke Cage and wears street clothes as a member of the Avengers. But he remains a hard-hitting, heart-of-gold sort of hero on the streets.
Why it would make a good movie: A lot of prominent black actors really really want to play Luke Cage. Several of them have been made their own short fan films with themselves in the role. That’s dedication and determination. Cage is as simple as it gets when it comes to superheroes, and could easily mix in with the sort of street drama tales out there. Have the super-powered Cage go up against gangs or other urban problems. Just be very careful to avoid the cliches, like say some sleazy white businessman as the villain or something. Keep it on the streets.
And maybe avoid the elderly, wise scrapyard keeper as the mentor. I’m looking at you, Steel.
3. Runaways
Precocious little scamps
Premise: On one fateful night, a group of friends in Los Angeles discover that their parents are diabolical super-villains. Panicked and afraid for their lives, the kids run away from home – but not before stealing some of their parents super-villain equipment and powers. One of them has a pair of super gauntlets. One girl has discovered she is a witch, another girl is an alien. The daughter of time-travelers now has a pet velociraptor, and the youngest and most adorable discovers her mutant power of super strength!
Can these kids get along and figure out their new abilities in time to stop their parents’ cruel plans and save the city? Do they even want to try?
Why it would make a good movie: This is another one of those films that is already in production somewhere along the line. Somebody somewhere is working on a Runaways movie. And that’s a great idea! It’s a fun, charming concept with a lot of great characters. It would be perfect for the same sort of crowd that went to see the Harry Potter movies. We’ve got a group of teens, with at least one youngster, on a wild and wacky adventure. They have to deal with adult problems while also engaging in superheroics. It’s perfect for a family-friendly movie.
The casting would probably have to be really good though. But just think back to a lot of classic kid groups, like in The Sandlot or The Goonies. It’s not hard to make a group of kids wonderfully cinematic. Even the recent Super 8 had a good group of kids. Find the right group of actors, give them a lot of character and not just sass, and you have a popular, fun sort of film.
2. Thunderbolts/Super-Villains
Not quite as precocious
Premise: A life of super-villainy only leads to one thing: getting your butt whooped by the hero. You’re a criminal, powers or not, so you’re bound for a lengthy prison sentence, if you’re not outright killed in the fight with the hero. So what is life like behind bars for the criminals zany enough to dress up in costumes and fight with super powers. What would the road to rehabilitation be like? What would the world look like once they’re let out from behind bars? Not every super-villain is an insane, megalomaniacal monster bent on world domination.
Why it would make a good movie: Superhero movies are played out, so how about a super-villain movie? Granted, it would be a movie about a villain seeking redemption, but still it would be about a more unscrupulous character than usual. They could grapple with choosing to stay evil or perhaps becoming a superhero. Maybe they’ll question the difference between just being a criminal and actually being evil. They could get into fights in prison, like a typical prison movie – just add super powers! There are a lot of paths for movies about criminals.
But who could Marvel pick?
My top choices would be the Beetle or The Shocker. One is the original star of Thunderbolts, the other just fits the role well. Let me explain that I don’t think the basic premise of the Thunderbolts, at least the original comic, should be made into a movie. Originally, the Thunderbolts were promoted and debuted as a new superhero team of brand new characters. Then for the cliffhanger at the end of Thunderbolts #1, it was revealed that they were actually a group of classic Marvel villains in disguise! They were only posing as heroes to fool everyone, granting them more and more power until they’d be in control. In a world before spoilers and the Internet, that surprise was pulled off nicely and Thunderbolts is still being published today. Eventually the villains decided they preferred being heroes, and so they went in that direction. Nowadays, the Thunderbolts is about a team of villains seeking redemption as part of their prison sentence.
All of this is far too complicated for a movie. But people could get behind a super-villain movie about a crook wanting to maybe turn over a new leaf. And Marvel has plenty of characters who could be the star. They’d just have to pick one and use a bunch of others as supporting characters. It would be a fun Who’s Who of low-level Marvel villains.
1. Silver Surfer – by Pixar
Fun Trivia: The Silver Surfer uses a surfboard because he has no need for a space ship, since he doesn’t need to breathe and can survive the vacuum of space. But he can’t fly under his own power. So for transport, he uses the simplest possible object: a flat board.
Premise: In order to save his home planet Zenn-La from destruction, Norrin Radd volunteers his life to servitude to the planet-eating cosmic entity known as Galactus. Norrin is transformed into the Sentinel of the Spaceways! Traveling the universe on his board, the Silver Surfer visits unique and colorful planets to find nourishment for his master. But how does the Surfer balance his own noble heart with the gruesomeness of his mission? Galactus serves a purpose, like a hunter thinning out the deer population, but how can the Surfer live with the guilt? Especially when all he wants to do is go home.
Why it would make a good movie: You don’t get more epic than the space-opera that is the Silver Surfer. Though the Fantastic Four sequel had a pretty good Silver Surfer (changes aside), they barely scratched the surface of what this character could portray on the big screen. But I do not recommend a live action film. Instead, Disney should create some corporate synergy and give us a collaboration between two of their properties: Marvel and Pixar!
Did you know both studios are owned by the House of Mouse?
Nearly everything Pixar touches is gold, and their love of minor characters and outcasts in big worlds is perfect for the Silver Surfer. I wouldn’t want them tackling someone as popular as Spider-Man (though it’d be awesome). The alien nature of the Surfer, and especially Galactus, would allow them to stretch beyond just human characters. Plus just imagine the gorgeous shots they could create of outer space, Zenn-La, any other planets the Surfer visits or of Galactus’ ship itself. Everybody hated Cloud Galactus in the Fantastic Four sequel. Going with Pixar instead of a live action CGI shot would be able to create the most glorious, imposing and majestic Galactus ever!
Plus the story of the Surfer is a lovely sort of human tale that’s perfect for the Pixar style. It’s a collaboration that needs to happen. Besides, Pixar already made a movie about the Fantastic Four.
I see what you did there
Henchman-4-Hire 