Category Archives: Comics
Review: Punisher #3
What should have been a vicious fight between the Punisher and lame-o villain Vulture is instead a murky, hard-to-follow shadowfest that I guess ends the only way it could. Sadly, that the entire issue is turned over to this fight scene is a shame because it’s a real dip in quality from what we’ve been reading so far, both in terms of art and storytelling. As I said in my last review, the new Vulture is just a stupid, uninteresting character and nowhere near the Punisher’s weight class.
Punisher #3
But I suppose this issue takes care of that problem – Punisher kills the Vulture!
I sort of predicted that in my last review. If you’re going to throw the Punisher up against real Marvel Universe villains, he’s going to want to kill them. So of course Marvel and writer Greg Rucka threw him a completely disposable nobody to dispatch. Introduced as a Spider-Man villain, the Vulture is so lame he ends up getting jobbed down to the Punisher. Take that, loser! Maybe be more interesting next time.
So yeah, this issue can be summed up in three words: Punisher vs. Vulture. The other ongoing storylines are only given the tiniest of pushes, though not much happens in any of them. We see detectives Bolt and Clemons, but they don’t do much of anything. The Bride has a few scenes that are clearly leading to something bigger, but we’re definitely not there yet.
There are two truly sucky issues with the fight scene: the art is too dark and murky to really follow, and neither of the two combatants say anything. For the third issue in a row, writer Rucka keeps the Punisher silent (except for the final page). He’s just a quiet killing machine. The Vulture, meanwhile, speaks in incomprehensible squawks. So the fight is basically just the Punisher silently stabbing the Vulture while the Vulture makes random squawks about who knows what.
Stabby McStabberson likes to stab
That’s practically the entire fight right there in that picture. The Vulture can fly, so right at the very beginning he picks up the Punisher in his talons from the warehouse and carries him off. The redhead villainous tells her men not to shoot the Vulture, and then they disappear for the rest of the issue. So the fight between the Punisher and the Vulture is in the air, but there’s nothing truly exciting about the fight. Basically it all takes place as an extended grapple, with Punisher getting the upper hand as he clings to the Vulture high above the streets of New York. Presumably he takes his knife and starts stabbing, but as I said, the art is just too dark and murky to really make anything out. It’s just ugly-looking stab followed by the Vulture spewing yellowish spit from his mandibles as he gets stabbed some more.
It’s not an interesting fight. For all the menace that the Vulture was supposed to inspire, he goes down fairly easily. Sure there’s some red thrown into the pictures to indicate blood, but it mostly looks like the Punisher got cut by accident. There’s no fight. There’s just stabbing until the Vulture goes down.
Or DOWWWWWWWNNNNNNN!! If you'd prefer
The issue ends with the Punisher stabbing Vulture through the head – up through the underside of his jaw, no less. But that means the Punisher is falling from their aerial fight! He lands in a dumpster and seems to get through it OK, though he’s all bloody and beat up. Still, he survives the fall without too much of a hassle. Then he utters the only words he’s said in three issues.
“You…help me.”
Who’s he talking to? Why it’s Norah Winters, the reporter who appeared last issue! She was alerted to the aerial fight and then followed Punisher in a cab, eventually making it to his crash site. We’re led to believe that maybe Bolt and Clemons are going to get there first, but nope, it’s Norah. She straight up asks how he was able to survive the fall, so perhaps there’s more to his fall than we realize. Rucka and artist Marco Checchetto also try to get cinematic with the fall. The panels of Punisher falling into the dumpster are intercut with panels of all the other characters. So we’re flashing from one scene to another. If this were a movie, there’d be some cool dramatic music playing. You can sort of see it playing in your head.
Anyway, as for the other characters in the book, detectives Bolt and Clemons are one step behind the Punisher and the bad guys. They arrive at the warehouse, but they’re too late because the Punisher and Vulture are gone. They find Liam’s body with his head blown off. Bolt thinks the Punisher did it, but Clemons disagrees and has already deduced that someone who can fly has already left the scene. Norah Winters takes Clemons’ advice and goes to the salon to get her blonde hair cut short. But she leaves in the middle of it, with her hair only half cut, because of the fight going on. Her appearance at the end seems to indicate a Punisher/Norah team-up for issue #4.
Sounds like a hoot.
The Bride is told by the doctors that she’ll have a long rehab process, but at the end of the issue she defiantly gets out of bed and tries to walk. That’s the part that’s intercut with the Punisher falling. The Bride gets a few steps before collapsing to her knees.
It may be a small bit of storytelling, but I think it’s clear that the Bride is supposed to be similar to the Punisher. Her family was gunned down as well, and now it’s just her and her military training. She’s clearly going to tough it through her rehab and get back on her feet, seeking vengeance. Previous Punisher writer Garth Ennis wrote a similar story, about a mob princess who lost everything and decided to become like the Punisher. In the end, neither she nor the police detective investigating that story had what it took to truly sink to Frank Castle’s dark, depressing level. I suppose we’ll see what happens with the Bride.
Perhaps the Punisher will get a sidekick?
Madrox Lives!
The day we’ve all been waiting for has arrived: the full X-Factor teaser has been released and Multiple Man lives! My fears of Jamie Madrox dying were for naught. Behold, faithful readers, of the awesomeness that is X-Factor!
He may be tucked way down off to the side, but at least he's there!
Madrox dying would have really put a crimp in my comic book reading habits. For all you non geeks, I figure it would be like if your favorite sports star was no longer playing the sport. Or if your favorite TV character left the show. The final season of Scrubs just wasn’t as good without JD. Of course I watched it, but it felt less than itself. That’s what a Madrox-less X-Factor would have been like.
And it’s not just Madrox, but Longshot and Polaris as well, which was one of my guesses from the last post. So that’s very exciting. Granted, there are now 11 characters on the team. That means less panel-time for everybody. But I’d like to think that writer Peter David knows what he’s doing. The man rejuvenated Multiple Man, after all! I’ve got to have faith!
For anyone interested, here are the full X-franchise teaser images for all their titles. None of the character reveals have made me want to pick up a book that I wasn’t already planning to pick up. Though now I’m even more excited to be getting Wolverine and the X-Men since Iceman and Toad are on the team. My brother Cippy is getting Cyclops and the Uncanny X-Men.
First is Wolverine and the ‘Gold Team’.
Click to enlarge
Second is Cyclops and the ‘Blue Team’.
Click to enlarge
The only sadness in all of this is that my other favorite X-Character, The Mimic, is not on any team. Oh well. Back to comic book oblivion for him.
Madrox Update – A Possible Stay of Execution?
Remember last week when Marvel Comics was teasing the possible death of my favorite comic book character, Jamie Madrox the Multiple Man? Well this week the teaser swings back in the other direction, indicating that Madrox may not be dying after all. He may still be around come the new X-Franchise revamp this winter. Clearly Marvel knows a thing or two about marketing. As a comic book geek, I’m on the edge of my seat.
Behold! The X-Factor teaser cover now has 3 distinct hidden characters!
Click to englarge
Could one of those three silhouettes be Multiple Man? Focus on the silhouette on the left. He’d got Madrox’s style of hair, and he’s clearly got some sort of collar, just like Madrox’s signature trench coat. This greatly increases the odds from last week, when Marvel had yet to reveal Strong Guy and that area was just one big blob of black. Back then, in the long long ago, I surmised that maybe there were two characters hidden in Strong Guy’s shadow. Now that there are 3, that gets my hopes up! Behold last week!
See the difference?
As I wrote last time, Marvel is making a big push for the X-Franchise in 2012, everything from Uncanny X-Men to New Mutants to my personal favorite, X-Factor. The teams are going to get new lineups with a bunch of new drama to deal with. Marvel is teasing this big push by releasing the covers for the upcoming issues, only with all the characters blacked out as silhouettes. Then week-by-week, they’re unveiling which characters are hidden in which silhouettes and will be on which team.
I read comics based primarily on the characters. So this teaser strategy is perfect in determining which X-books I’m going to be reading.
Hopefully next week (or the week after) we may find out once and for all if Madrox is making the cut.
That’s the extent of the news, but if you’re interested in comic book stuff, I think I’m going to break this down a little bit more. So we’ve got three characters, one of which has short hair, one of which has a bit longer hair to the ears and one of which has either big hair or is wearing some kind of a hood. I think this means we have two guys and a girl, or a hood.
Let’s break it down:
Who are we missing? Out of the current X-Factor team, the three missing characters are Madrox, Longshot and Darwin (though he’s on sabbatical). They do not yet appear on this cover. Both Madrox and Longshot have similar hair, and could be either one of those two short-haired male characters. Darwin could be wearing a hood. So perhaps nobody dies in November and the team stays exactly the same with the addition of Havok, that blonde guy in the middle with the blue glowy powers.
Remember the 90s? Back in the mid-90s, there was an X-Factor series very similar to the current series. Both were written by Peter David, both were about a mutant team spun-off from the X-Men and both featured the same characters. In fact, Multiple Man and Strong Guy both became popular in the mid-90s X-Factor. Havok was on that team as well, along with Wolfsbane and a few others.
The 90s were X-Treme!
So with Peter David still writing, and Havok joining the team, we’re clearly looking at some kind of 90s reunion sort of series. Comic book fans love references to old stuff, and the 90s X-Factor was incredibly popular. Heck, love for that series is what gave birth to the current X-Factor after all. So Marvel is definitely banking on that. Which means, why kill Multiple Man? Keep him around for the 90s reunion!
Which leads me to believe that the ‘hooded’ figure is actually 90s member Polaris! She’s the chick up there with the green hair. Polaris and Havok have been out having an adventure in space for the past few years. They’re a couple. So it only stands to reason that Polaris would join Havok in X-Factor, as well as add to the 90s reunion.
So I think Polaris is that hooded or big-haired character.
And I’m going to go out on a limb and say Longshot in the character in the middle, with the hair that goes down to his ears.
Or we might just have some random new character add some new blood to the team!
They could all be Madrox! Remember, Multiple Man’s super-power is that he can make duplicates of himself. Walking, talking, thinking duplicates of himself. And the catalyst for Peter David’s recent revival of Multiple Man was that he sent a bunch of duplicates out into the world to learn different things. Then when the main Madrox reabsorbs them, he gains all that knowledge. Perhaps the main Madrox will still die…but then a bunch of duplicates from around the world will return and join the team. That would account for the different hairstyles and the possible hood.
We shall see! I’ll stay on this story all month if I have to!
6 Unsung Patriotic Superheroes
Everybody knows about Captain America. He’s a living legend! Plus he had that big, fancy movie earlier this Summer. But you don’t come here to Henchman-4-Hire to read what you already know. You’re here for greater depth in your comic book knowledge. So in honor of Labor Day, I decided to write up a quick list of 6 America-themed superheroes that you probably never heard of.
Some successful. Some not.
6. Uncle Sam:
Kicking ass for America!
Yes, the actual and literal Uncle Sam come to life. Starring in DC Comics alongside Superman and Wonder Woman, Uncle Sam was even a supporting character in the Justice League. He’s got a whole host of general super-powers, like super strength, speed, agility and the ability to just plain kick ass. His origin is that the Founding Fathers performed an occult ritual to give the ‘Spirit of America’ a physical form. He served as various guises over the years until finally emerging as Uncle Sam in the late 1800s. Nowadays he’s the leader of the Freedom Fighters, a badass team of super spies and secret agent superheroes working for the U.S. Government.
5. Iron Patriot:
Evil in the name of America!
You’re right, that does look like a cross between Iron Man and Captain America. That’s the point. In reality, it’s the Iron Patriot, the ‘heroic’ guise of Norman Osborn! Remember him from the Spider-Man movie? He was the villainous Green Goblin. Norman Osborn is a crazy man, but he’s also a businessman. And in that capacity, Osborn stayed sane long enough for certain government people to start trusting him. Then he was put in charge of the Thunderbolts, a government team of super-villains being used as heroes.
When he helped repel an alien invasion, Norman was seen as such a hero that the American government put him in charge of H.A.M.M.E.R., a new version of S.H.I.E.L.D. He was America’s top cop, and as such, he formed his own team of Avengers, all of whom were secretly villains posing as heroes. Norman took on the identity of the Iron Patriot, repainting some of Iron Man’s old armors. Stark was on the outs with the government at the time, viewed as a bad guy. For a few months, Norman led the ‘Dark’ Avengers on a few heroic missions. They actually helped people, despite being super-villains in disguise.
In the end, though, Norman bit off more than he could chew by leading his Dark Avengers against Thor and Asgard. He was revealed to be the psycho that he was, and got locked up. Though there are hints that he’s soon to be free and troubling the heroes once again.
4. The Spirit of ’76:
Old timey and fun, I suppose
Now that’s an exciting superhero name! He was created in the 70s as a patriotic hero for Marvel Comics, and his history is that William Naslund wanted to do more for the war effort in World War II. So taking Captain America as an inspiration, Naslund became really athletic and created this costumed identity. He served as a member of The Crusaders alongside a bunch of other random heroes. So basically a poor man’s Captain America serving at around the same time.
When Cap was frozen in the Atlantic (like at the end of his movie), the U.S. Government recruited Naslund to replace him. They gave him a costume and a shield, and Naslund was Cap for a few years before being killed by a robot. Comcis, everybody!
3. Mister America:
Possibly the lamest superhero costume ever
There’s a whole line of superheroes in the DC Universe who go by the name of Mister America. The first one, Tex Thompson, actually debuted in Action Comics #1 in 1938, the same comic that was the first appearance of Superman! As the costume implies, he’s just a dude in some patriotic-colored clothes who has a whip that fights crime. Thompson went on to become the Americommando during World War II.
That picture is from the modern day Mr. America in the pages of Justice Society of America. Similar to the Justice League, the Justice Society is made up of heroes that debuted before Superman and Batman in the comics timeline. It’s a little bit complicated, but essentially the heroes in the Justice Society are all old men in their 50s and 60s, whereas Superman, Batman and their generation are all in their 20s or 30s. In Justice Society, these old heroes are training and working with the next generation of heroes, composed of descendants of old heroes.
Thompson’s descendant debuted in the first issue of a recent JSA relaunch, only to die in that same issue. Dumbass. Then his FBI partner Jeffrey Graves took up the costume and whip and has had a much more successful superhero career.
2. Isiah Bradley and Patriot:
The black Captain America
Did you know there was a black Captain America? In a somewhat controversial comic released a few years ago called Truth: Red, White and Black, it was revealed that after Steve Rogers was given the super soldier serum, the U.S. Government tried to recreate it and conducted secret, often-fatal experiments on African-Americans. It treated them like lab rats. Something akin to the Tuskegee Syphilis Study.
The only survivor of the experiments was Isiah Bradley. He was taken overseas during WWII, and using a stolen Cap costume, he stormed the Nazi’s own attempts to recreate the Super Soldier Program. He successfully defeated the bad guys, but got kidnapped and brought before Hitler himself! Eventually Bradley was saved and returned stateside, only to spend nearly 20 years in federal prison on a court marshal. He eventually got pardoned in the 60s and spent the rest of his life at home, since the experiments had failed to recreate the true Super Soldier Serum and instead left Bradley with a deteriorated mind.
But throughout the years, he became a living legend as the ‘black Captain America’, but that legend only seemed to exist in the black community. He was visited by many important black icons. And eventually, Bradley had a grandson named Eli Bradley.
He's like a tiny Captain America!
Eli is the hero known as The Patriot. He’s a member of the Young Avengers. It was a surprise hit series from a few years ago. The idea was silly (kid Avengers?) but the writer hit it out of the park and the Young Avengers became a popular success! They’ve had a few series, since the writer hasn’t exactly been reliable, and they appear now and again in big Marvel stories. Eli was on a short list of young people that the Avengers were keeping track of, and the young version of Iron Man got ahold of the list and put a team together to fight Kang the Conqueror, a time traveling super-villain.
Eli led the team to victory, though it was later revealed that he didn’t have any super powers. He was actually using a recreational drug that gave people super powers. When his friends found out, they turned their backs on him until he cleaned up. Later, Eli was injured and had to get a blood transfusion from his grandfather Isiah Bradley. The super-powered blood from grandpa finally gave Eli powers for real.
1. U.S. Agent:
100% American Badass!
The man who would be Captain America! Picture the Captain America you know, now imagine him as far more conservative, badass and something of an arrogant jackass. That’s John Walker! He’s a second-rate Captain America, copying him in powers, costume and shield. But he’s stuck around for years, and has served as both an Avenger and a member of Alpha Flight. He’s a legitimate hero, not just some chump joke. Whereas Steve Rogers is more heroic, good-natured and inspirational, John Walker is just a hard-nosed, brutal ass-kicker. I’m a big fan.
Walker debuted in the 80s as a soldier who, after he was discharged, decided to get some super powers. There’s a villain out there called the Power Broker, and he gave Walker super strength, speed and agility. Powers similar to Captain America. Walker became the Super-Patriot to pay off the Power Broker, and then went around challenging Captain America while also doing good for the country. Eventually, Steve Rogers stepped down as Cap because the government wanted to turn him into something of a lapdog. Cap wasn’t about to be used, even by the U.S. Government, so he resigned. The government then scooped up Walker to be the new Captain America. Much like The Spirit of ’76 once served as a fill-in Cap. But then Rogers eventually came back, and Walker switched to being the U.S. Agent.
Eat hot patriotism, motha'fuckers!
He continued to serve the U.S. government, and eventually joined both the Avengers and the West Coast Avengers, who were based on the west coast. Yep. He made a few costume changes now and again, jumping in with different teams and organizations, but most recently he returned to his more well-known red, white and black Cap knock-off costume. He was a member of the good guy Avengers again when Norman Osborn led his assault against Thor and Asgard. During the fight, Walker got his arm and legged ripped off. Most people would retire when that happened.
But not John Walker! He just went ahead and got a robotic arm and leg and became the warden of a super-villain prison!
That's just a flesh wound!
Honorable mentions: There are a ton of random American superheroes. I chose some of the main ones from Marvel and DC comics, and that’s not a full list. There’s still Battlestar, Liberty Belle, Major Victory, S.T.R.I.P.E., American Dream, American Eagle; plus heroes from other comic companies like The Shield, Captain Flag, Yankee Girl, American Maid and many more!
Is Madrox on the Chopping Block?
Update: New teaser reveals gives us new hope! Click here.
This just in, Marvel Comics may kill my favorite comic book character of all time! Anyone who remembers my list of My 6 Favorite Comic Book Characters will remember that Jamie Madrox, the Multiple Man, is my absolute favorite. But new teaser images released from his comic, X-Factor, are hinting at the death of Multiple Man sometime this Fall.
Can I not have nice things?
My favorite hero
Starting in October/November or so, the entire X-Men line of comics is undergoing a Regenesis. After the Schism, Cyclops and Wolverine will be splitting the X-Men down the middle. Half will stay with Cyclops in California, while half will return to New York with Wolverine. Likewise, Marvel is splitting their X-Men comics down the middle. Four titles will be on Cyclops’ side and four will be on Wolverine’s side. We’ve known for a few weeks now that X-Factor will be on Wolverine’s side. Their new Regenesis comic is scheduled to come out in January.
So why do I think Multiple Man is a dead man? Two reasons. First, here is the new teaser image released today:
Where is Multiple Man hiding?
Mutiple Man is nowhere in sight! Several characters are still in silhouette, including an obvious Strong Guy and Banshee, but many more have been revealed. Amongst them is the return of Havok, the blonde guy front and center. Havok is not a regular member of X-Factor, so his joining the team is one of the new changes as part of Regenesis. But Havok is in the leader’s spot, and Multiple Man is supposed to be the leader of the team. So there we have one very big clue.
Second, the solicitations for the November issue of X-Factor claim that one member of the team will die!
In this issue, a member of X-Factor dies.
Eep!
So someone will die in November, and Multiple Man is nowhere to be seen on the January cover. In fact, Havok has seemingly taken over Madrox’s role as leader of the team. So I think the clues are pretty strong towards Multiple Man dying. Another character on the team, Longshot, is also so far missing from the cover. And somebody’s probably standing in front of Strong Guy. So there’s still hope. But it’s not looking good.
And this sucks.
I mean, what the hell? I know it’s silly to get upset over the ‘death’ of a fictional character. But level with me here. Multiple Man is my favorite comic book character. I love reading about his adventures. I read comics for the characters. The writer of X-Factor, Peter David, plucked Madrox from obscurity a few years ago and has been writing him as a fascinating and complex protagonist for a long time now. Madrox is a star! Sure there are probably plenty of in-story reasons to kill him, but c’mon. Can’t I have my favorite character still alive? Still around to read about on a monthly basis?
Comics will just be a bit more depressing if Multiple Man is dead.
But I suppose it’s not that big of a deal. He ‘died’ once before, back in X-Factor #100. Then a few issues later he came back and just said, “Nope, I didn’t die, it was only a duplicate!” So that could always happen again. I’ll keep my hopes up that he’ll stay alive, or that PAD has some deeper plans for Madrox than just killing him off in order to write Havok instead.
On a semi-related note, they also revealed the Regenesis cover for Wolverine and the X-Men. My brother and I have agreed to split, he’ll get the Cyclops led Uncanny X-Men while I get the Wolverine book. And now I’m definitely happy with that choice because look who they’ve revealed to be on Wolverine’s team.
Toad is in the bottom left corner
Iceman and Toad! Two of my favorite X-characters! And Toad is supposed to be a bad guy, a member of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants! I’ve been a fan of Toad since the X-Men movies, and he’s been simmering in the background, waiting for years now to do something awesome. This could be it! I can’t wait to see Toad take center stage!
If only it wasn’t at the cost of Multiple Man…
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