I am not a fan of reality television, but the rest of the world is clearly in love. Ordinary people are turned into TV stars in shows like Ice Road Truckers, Pawn Stars or Hoarders. Programs focus on the day-to-day of real jobs or real lives more so than scripted television. Viewers are enthralled by every minute detail of the Kardashian family or the Real Housewives of Wherever for no other reason than the cult of celebrity. There is a show where Steve Urkel and other Z-list “celebrities” dance for our amusement, and a show glamorizing unwed, 16-year-old mothers – and both shows are  incredibly popular. Jersey Shore!

X-Factor #236

We are living in the Mojoverse and we don’t even realize it.

Comic rating: 3/5: Alright.

Writer Peter David throws that bomb at our feet in this issue, and I for on am absolutely blown away. Whereas once upon a time the villainous Mojo’s TV-obsessed world was a parody of sleazy studio executives and bad taste, it has now become the stark, cold reality of our own television programming. We may not have real live gladiatorial combat yet, but how long until it’s here? How long until people are maliciously hurting one another for our amusement on reality TV?

The idea of Mojo being behind the nation’s love of the Kardashians would make a great story. How would our heroes fight against pop culture’s seemingly endless obsession with trashy TV?

Unfortunately, this brilliant idea is wasted and buried in an issue that amounts to little more than an extended fight scene between Shatterstar and the new villain Scattershot, who himself is a parody of trashy comic books. The fight’s OK, if you’re into extended fight scenes. But this issue has little else going for it, with barely any appearance of anyone else from X-Factor. The fight itself is lacking any deep character conflict, with Scattershot being one-dimensional and Shatterstar just showing off his fighting skills. There are a few hints towards Peter David’s larger plans for the series, but those hints continue to be so vague that I just don’t care anymore. So all in all, this is an issue that just doesn’t amount to much.

Other than that amazing Mojoverse idea!

We open with Far Sight, the wannabe mutant from the X-Ceptionals who can ‘see the future’, or so he claims. Well it’s Far Sight’s lucky day, because now he really is getting visions of the future – courtesy of a ghostly Damien Tryp. This is that tease I mentioned in the opening. The elder Tryp most recently appeared during Multiple Man’s recent jaunt across different dimensions. And there, just like here, he only vaguely hints at what’s going to happen in the future. We don’t get anything of substance, only that Far Sight has tears in his eyes from seeing these visions.

He doesn’t like them, is what’s being conveyed.

Visions of the Jersey Shore movie?

We then cut to Lord Defender and Multitask (Multiple Man in disguise) catching Seattle’s notorious West Side Groper! Then they have to pull one of his female victims off the guy when she starts angrily kicking him in the gut. Funny little scene, I suppose. Lord Defender then gets a call from Alfonse, the drug dealer we met last issue. Alfonse tells him that Buzzkill is dead, and that Shatterstar is next!

Scattershot still has his gun trained right on Shatterstar, but the acrobatic X-Factor guy easily dodges the first shot and the fight is on! The two duel back and forth, bantering all the while. It’s a typical fight. Scattershot shoots some cops who show up, Shatterstar slices through a car that’s thrown at him with his double blades. It’s a fight. I’m not going to give you the play-by-play. Nothing about it is particularly badass, the art is serviceable and the dialogue/banter is acceptable at best.

This picture sums it up nicely

When Scattershot threatens to shoot Alfonse, Shatterstar promises to fight with honor, and retracts his blades. Scattershot seems to like that, and he holsters his gun. They continue fighting. Scattershot introduces himself and reveals that he was sent by Mojo, which angers Shatterstar. More fighting and bantering.

At one point we cut back to Multiple Man and Lord Defender, who don’t exactly know where the fight is taking place. So Multiple Man blows his cover and creates several dupes to spread out and look. Lord Defender is amazed that he’s been working with real Multiple Man. He thought Multitask was just a poser.

Nothing but awesome Multiple Man action here, pal

Back at the fight, we finally start teasing Scattershot’s mind-blowing idea about the state of TV programming today. Have you seen the fall schedule? Especially Bravo and A&E, he asks?

Though there is one really funny line in this comic.

And it’s a poop joke

Anyway, as the fight continues, Scattershot breaks out this theory of his about the world. It’s spread across multiple panels, so I can’t really show it to you all at once, so I think I’ll just quote it. I love this theory.

“These people…these humans. They vote on the fates of talent contestants as if the whole world has become one huge arena giving a thumbs up or down. They treat the ongoing struggles and personal traumas of their celebrities as if they’re unfolding for their entertainment. There’s not even a sense of outrage anymore! It’s the norm! You come here and try to tell yourself that Mojo and his entertainment-obsessed, other-dimensional world is just some aberration? You thought you escaped the Mojoverse? Baby, you’re soaking in it.”

I just love this idea. Peter David needs to turn this into the next big Event Comic.

For those who don’t know, this is Mojo:

Comics need more Mojo

He lives and rules in an alternate dimension where everything is based around his television empire. He puts on these wild shows, and all the people who live in the dimension are glued to their sets. He’s a classic X-Men villain who has often tried to kidnap the X-Men to star in his next show. Both Shatterstar and Longshot of X-Factor were created by Mojo, but escaped the Mojoverse and joined the X-Men. I’ve never particularly been a fan of any of it, but I definitely remember Mojo from the X-Men cartoon of the 90s. Good times.

Anyway, in the fight, Alfonse picks up one of the police officers’ guns and shoots Scattershot, distracting him so that Shatterstar can kick him in the face. Scattershot then grabs Shatterstar in a bear hug, but Shatterstar grabs Scattershot’s gun and shoots him!

Finish Him!

Multiple Man and Lord Defender show up just in time to watch the defeated Scattershot teleport back to the Mojoverse. Lord Defender mourns his dead friend Buzzkill, and then offers Alfonse a spot on the X-Ceptionals. But Alfonse blows him off and leaves. Lord Defender watches him go, and predicts that Alfonse will come around. And there’s one way to know for sure, they can just ask Far Sight. He knows things.

But it’s too late. Far Sight has shot himself in the head after getting those visions from Tryp. He scrawled a note that reads, “Didn’t want to see anymore.”

So kind of a depressing ending. I’m not sure what this says about Peter David’s opinion of Phoenix Jones and the other ‘real-life’ superheroes who are living and working in Seattle. Pretty much all of them end up dead, and the only survivor is played off as a deluded fool. David probably doesn’t have a very high opinion of them. Unless this was all a big joke? I dunno.

But like I said, this issue is mostly just fighting, and not very entertaining fighting. There’s maybe one good joke in the whole issue, and very little character building besides that. Scattershot never becomes more than the obvious parody, but then that’s probably the point. No real new ground is covered for Shatterstar. He’s always been a good fighter, and here it’s more of the same. He fights, he wins, end of comic. And Multiple Man doesn’t do enough to matter.

So aside from that one cool Mojoverse idea, this issue didn’t really have anything going for it. And all of these vague hints about what’s coming up down the line are starting to get boring. I’m far more interested in spending time with these characters in the here and now than I am in some big catastrophe awaiting them in the future.

Hopefully next issue looks like it might focus more on character development! Huzzah!