Review: Scarlet Spider #7

I declare this to be an absolutely perfect issue of Scarlet Spider – though the new artist leaves a bit to be desired. This is a wonderful little comic, full of comedy, action and spontaneity. I was worried that Kaine was going to be stuck in a rut after the past few issues, at least as far as his cast is concerned, but writer Christopher Yost threw me a curveball that I never would have seen coming. And I like what it might mean for the series in the future. We also get a new villainous enterprise to deal with, one with a definite Houston-esque feel to it. And that last page cliffhanger practically screams ‘Texas!’

Scarlet Spider #7

And this issue is funny! Like, laugh-out-loud funny. Kaine isn’t cracking wise and making quips like his Manhattan ‘cousin’, but the writing in this issue is top notch.

Comic rating: 5/5: Great.

The only problem, and it’s not much of a problem, is new artist Khoi Pham. Previous artist, Ryan Stegman, has been promoted to the Fantastic Four series, so I imagine that’s a big step up from something like Scarlet Spider. More power to him. But Pham does not do as good a job with the Scarlet Spider character, his costume, and definitely not the action. Stegman drew fantastic, inventive action scenes that were full of energy. Pham, not so much. But it’s not that big of a deal. The rest of the issue is drawn quite well, and I’ve no doubt that Pham, if he’s sticking around, will get the hang of it.

Best of all, this issue really shines with Kaine and his unique personality. The tagline ‘All of the power, none of the responsibility’ lives up to its bold claim this issue. Kaine is a little wild, he’s a little cruel, and he’s definitely struggling with this whole ‘superhero’ thing. He’s not just a goody-two-shoes like Peter Parker, and it definitely shines through in this issue. I hope Yost really pushes this personality in Kaine, because I think he has the potential to be a really cool protagonist.

Join me after the jump for a full synopsis and more review!

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Y: The Last Movie

This needs to be made by a real studio, right now.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with Y: The Last Man, I’ll give you a synopsis:

A mysterious plague has wiped out every human male on the planet, except for one. How does the hero cope as the last of his kind, in a world ruled by women? It’s smart, well-written, genuinely funny at times, and now it has its own fan-film.

The Day I Killed Hitler

Stargazing was a bit different in 1944

Sniper Elite V2 casts you into the role of a rugged, chiseled, surprisingly well-coiffed sniper at the end of WW2. With an emphasis on stealth, long-range shootouts and setting traps, this game is beautifully detailed and far more satisfying than the majority of WW2 shooters I’ve played.

It’s always the one in the middle.

With a spring in your step and a song in your heart, you traipse through the rubble of Berlin with your trusty sniper rifle, utterly annihilating any opposition that stands in your way. Most of your kills will result in a slow-motion presentation that follows your bullet from the barrel of your gun on its merry journey into the body of the least-fortunate nazi in the world. This is combined with an x-ray display of exactly how horribly your victim died (in the same vein as Mortal Kombat 9), just before a score is presented on your screen, rating any given kill you make.

Now he’ll never be head nazi.

Being both English and Jewish, I can tell you that I always feel a bit of smug satisfaction when I blow a Nazi’s tonsils off, but it’s rare that a gaming system tells me how well I did at snuffing out his life. And while it might seem arbitrary and pointless to congratulate a player on the act of killing a nazi (an average gamer could kill fifty per day and still not find it worthy of boasting about), it’s an immensely satisfying feeling when I get a high score for a beautifully-rendered, often gruesome kill. It feels a bit like getting an outstanding mark on my report card, or winning a cheap prize at a boardwalk game booth.

The game plays smoothly, and the graphics for the PC version are extremely detailed. In all, you receive a very deep, gratifying gaming experience for your money, with only a few real gripes about it.

For one thing, almost every encounter ends in a firefight. And while that’s half the point with most WW2 shooters, it somehow feels as though you’ve failed as a sniper when the entire population of the Nazi Germany turns on you after your very first shot. And while the game offers you chances to conceal your activities while sniping (timing your shots with the explosions of bombs or the chimes of churchbells, for instance), you usually don’t have too much stealth to your advantage afterward. At this point it stops being about killing a specific target, and more about killing Everyone.

Thankfully, they haven’t yet discovered the concept of Nazi zombies.

As you assassinate every Nazi in the world and deal with Soviet soldiers on your mission to kill a group of Nazi V2 Rocket scientists all by yourself, you get the distinct feeling that not only are you winning the War single-handedly, without an Ally in sight.

The multi-player experience allows for less stealth, as a team of two is far easier for the enemy to spot, but it’s nearly as satisfying as the single-player mode. Using teamwork and a shared hatred of nazis (but sadly no baseball bats), your partner takes the role of an anonymous, somewhat generic fellow soldier as the both of you engage in a wholesale slaughter of the Third Reich.

If you’ve beaten the campaign, however, and your craving for goose-stepping aryan blood isn’t sated, you can kill Hitler for a little extra in the game’s only current DLC.

Some experiences may vary.

Sniping Hitler sounds more satisfying than it is, however. For one thing, the DLC is single-player only, in the form of a Challenge-level. Here, you’re thrown into a parallel reality in which Der Handlebar arrives at a train station by motorcar, and you are there to take the shot that ends his life.

Your objective is to sneak to a vantage point before Hitler arrives, and snipe him on his way to the train. You’re spotted, however, and it becomes a Nazi shootout with the Fuhrer darting from one bit of cover to the next. Once you’ve killed every nazi in the level, Hitler rushes to the train itself, and you have a window of about five seconds to snipe him in mid-sprint.

Before I played this, I wasn’t sure if any game company could ever take the gratification out of the possibility of blowing Hitler’s moustache off, but Rebellion Games has succeeded. Killing Hitler is something that should be savoured. It’s something that you should take your time doing, and enjoy it as long as you can.

While I can appreciate that it’s a CHALLENGE map, the challenge should have been getting into position and getting away with killing the Nazi leader–not in the assassination, itself. This could have been done in any venue: Sneaking into a building overlooking one of Hitler’s speeches, or shooting him through the window of his estate, or a diner. The fact that he knows its coming and does everything he can to evade it completely eliminates the point.

As a game, I can’t recommend Sniper Elite V2 enough. Despite a few minor flaws, it’s an amazing romp through the second World War and I’m happy that I got to experience it.

As for the Kill Hitler DLC, there are two additional rifles that it offers aside from the three available in the Campaign mode that you may enjoy, and despite the linear, joyless method in which you have to complete the mission, you can still glean some satisfaction in killing the greatest monster of the 20th century.

I give the game 8/10, and the DLC 6/10.

Happy sniping!

Peter Parker vs. The World

I wish I could draw as well as ~the-madman. Then I could cast off this silly existence based on writing!

Robin the Boy Wonder Rises

I love Robin, but man that guy takes a lot of flak. But what if the Burt Ward Robin of the 1960s was in the Dark Knight Rises?

The above video was by the sketch comedy troupe Paulilu Mixtape, and it’s pretty darn funny. Poor Robin. He’s never going to live down Burt Ward.

I hope to write up an essay on why I think Robin would fit nicely in the Nolanverse. But then I’ve been planning this essay for years and have never started it. So how will I get it down within the two weeks we have until Dark Knight Rises? I have no idea…but keep your fingers crossed!