Whether it’s to make up for the massive pile of reviews last week, or maybe just plain old laziness, my stack was a bit shorter this week. Less work for me, right gang? Who doesn’t love to slack off a little bit during the week. Maybe kick up the heels and watch that new Axe Cop cartoon? I know I do!

Though I was apparently hard at work elsewhere on the Internet. You can check out my reviews for Inhuman #2 and Deadpool #29 by clicking those links. Both comics were pretty bad. I just can’t get into Deadpool‘s humor, and Inhuman continues to be a spectacularly worthless comic. If all of Marvel’s hopes and dreams depend on turning Inhumans into the new mutants, they are pretty screwed – or maybe we’re pretty screwed, because there’s probably nothing stopping Marvel from just bulldozing over what we want in favor of what they want. Did you hear about the Fantastic Four?

Bad comics continue over at DC this week, with the worst issue of Batman Eternal yet. If there’s anyone else out there in comic book land who also can’t stand what they’re doing with the Gotham Police in Batman Eternal, please let me know. I hope I’m not the only one pulling their hair out.

Fortunately, this week also saw a new issue of Ms. Marvel, and that fills me with overwhelming joy. Kamala Khan is just too awesome. Ms. Marvel #4 easily wins Comic Book of the Week for its humor, its heart and, finally, its superheroics. Our little Kamala is growing up!

The look on her face brings me nothing but joy

Comic Reviews: Avengers #30, Batman #31, Batman Eternal #8, Ms. Marvel #4 and Nightwing #30.

Avengers #30

Avengers #30
Writer: Jonathan Hickman
Artist: Leinil Francis Yu

So much for wanting to get back into Jonathan Hickman’s Avengers. After a stellar two issues that really dig into the characters and their interpersonal conflicts, it looks instead like Hickman is just going to send a small bunch of Avengers on some weird time travel jaunt into weird, Hickman-inspired futures.

After the confrontation last issue, the Time Gem sends the Avengers 50 years into the future, where they immediately encounter a team of future Avengers. Among them is an older Hawkeye, who has a bunch of typically cryptic things to say about their current adventure, but no real solid answers. He’s also mad at Tony Stark for not saving the world, and he has something to whisper to Captain America. A few other future Avengers have some cryptic things to tell the team before the Time Gem returns and transports the team 420 years into the future.

Comic Rating: 5/10 – Alright.

There were bits and pieces of this issue that were fun, but as a whole, it was disappointing. Also, before we get started, wasn’t Age of Ultron last year supposed to alter time travel forever? Was that not a thing? Now Hickman’s Avengers are just going to bounce around time all willy nilly like, for purposes that probably won’t become clear until later. As much as I like Hickman’s stuff in general, I find some of his more far-out-there stories to be less than what I want. He’s great when it comes to the grounded, human-side of the weird stuff he writes, but this new story looks to be nothing more than Hickman coming up with weird, wild futures. No thanks. Maybe I’ll come back when the focus is back on the characters, not their Hickman-inspired adventures.

Batman #31

Batman #31
Writer: Scott Snyder
Artist: Greg Capullo

We’re almost at the end of Zero Year, and while I still think this story about the Riddler turning Gotham City into Fallout for an entire month is a little too ludicrous to be this early in Batman’s career, I can at least appreciate a good comic. Snyder finds a way to add some tension into this issue, making it one of the most exciting of Zero Year so far.

Batman, Gordon and Lucius Fox hatch a plan to trace Riddler’s signal to his hideout, but in order to pull it off, they need to keep Riddler talking on his big screen for 19 minutes. So Batman gears up and accepts Riddler’s daily challenge. He uses his time to taunt Riddler’s background, and I guess his proposed riddle is: Who is Batman? Riddler takes a stab at it and fails miserably. But Riddler opens up the trap door anyway, causing Batman to fall into the lion’s pit. Batman invites Riddler to stick around and watch while he defeats the two lions. Still the sore loser, Riddler then causes a bunch of cars to fall on Batman, but Gordon has found a back door into the pit and pulls Batman to safety. At least Lucius managed to trace Riddle’rs signal.

Comic Rating: 8/10 – Very Good.

Maybe that’s what’s been missing from Zero Year: tension. Knowing Batman had to keep the Riddler talking for 19 minutes made the issue just that much more exciting. An intellectual showdown between Batman and Riddler is almost the entire point of their encounters, and Snyder is positioned to tell a really good one. That this issue also features Batman fighting lions is an added bonus. But watching him keep the Riddler on the line was even better. Though I kind of wish Batman actually had a real riddle that the Riddler couldn’t crack. I kept waiting for him to really nail Nygma with a clever barb that left the villain too flustered to think. But nope, this Batman is still too green for that sort of thing.

Batman Eternal #8

Batman Eternal #8
Writers: Scott Snyder, James Tynion IV and John Layman
Artist: Guillem March

This is getting out of hand. I wanted to like Batman Eternal, I really did! I wanted to have faith! You have to believe me! A massive Batman conspiracy story that stretches across all corners of Gotham City, written by Scott Snyder and his band of merry men? It sounds too good to be true! And it is, it truly is too good to be true. Because instead, we get Batman Eternal and its utter dearth of logic.

Commissioner McCrookedcops’ reign of terror knows no bounds. After Batman spends a whole night capturing Falcone’s thugs across the city, Forbes just lets them all go immediately. Bard and Bullock privately question what’s happening, but frankly, they don’t seem to care, because if they don’t do as Forbes wants, it will cost them their jobs. Poor babies. Your new, psychotic boss is clearly taking orders from the new crime boss in town, and is willfully putting dangerous criminals back on the streets, but you can’t do anything about it, because you’ll lose your jobs. How sad.

But what’s even worse is that Batman is falling for it too! God dammit.

Falcone tells Forbes that he wants to send Batman a message, so Forbes lights the Bat Signal and has a ton of cops just sitting out on the roof for an obvious ambush. But Batman just shows up, lands on the roof and asks Forbes to talk. Batman legitimately believes he and Forbes can be pals and tries to have a friendly conversation with the guy! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Has he never heard of Forbes before? Batman knows every member of the GCPD, especially someone as high ranking as Forbes. So would at least freakin’ Batman know how corrupt and evil Forbes is? Wouldn’t Batman have some idea what a lost cause it would be to even attempt this kind of conversation? Wouldn’t Batman know that Forbes was letting the thugs go? WOULDN’T BATMAN KNOW SUCH AN OBVIOUS AMBUSH WHEN HE SEES IT?

Jeez. Anyway, Bard tricks the smoke bomb officers to fire first, giving Batman cover for his escape. Afterwards, Forbes is pretty annoyed that Bard is such a screwup. Elsewhere, Bard meets and chats with Vicki Vale, and Stephanie Brown continues to run from her dad.

Comic Rating: 3/10 – Bad.

These people, these great Batman creators, are writing a terrible Batman. They are writing a terrible story. None of the main plot points and characters in this story make any logical sense. Well, that’s not true. I suppose most of them are fine. But this sheer lunacy with Commissioner Forbes is so overwhelmingly ridiculous that it overshadows every other aspect of the book, and turns Batman into a blithering idiot! Batman is supposed to be smarter than this! He’s supposed to be hyper-aware and prepared for this kind of stupidity! How is he not familiar with Forbes’ particular brand of corruption? Wouldn’t he have extensive files on Forbes? The guy doesn’t make any effort to hide how much he hates Jim Gordon and hates legitimate police work. Yet Batman happily, almost optimistically, strolls right into Forbes’ blatantly obvious trap.

Just like Batman strolling right up into Falcone’s office a few issues ago, he just strolls right up to Forbes here. Since when does Batman just stroll right up to anybody? Especially somebody he should know is infinitely corrupt, evil, and has it out for him? Isn’t Batman smarter and sneakier that that? Doesn’t Batman have even an ounce of finesse?

I’m ranting and I know it. But I’m only ranting because this is Scott FREAKING Snyder here. He’s the guy behind the routinely excellent Batman comic, and a brief Detective Comics run before that. He’s the guy who has turned Batman into one of the only good comics left at DC. But somehow he and his people are writing a completely different Batman in the pages of Batman Eternal. Whereas in Batman, the Dark Knight is cool, focused, wickedly efficient and dedicated, here he’s a bumbling thug who hasn’t met a problem he can’t confront head-on. It’s frustrating. To say nothing of how inept Harvey Bullock, Maggie Sawyer and Jason Bard all now look in the face of Forbes’ evil.

“I was just following orders” is never, ever a suitable excuse, guys.

Ms. Marvel #4

Ms. Marvel #4
Writer: G. Willow Wilson
Artist: Adrian Alphona

I don’t know what other praise I can possibly heap onto the new Ms. Marvel. It’s everything I want in a comic book these days. It’s adorable, smart, witty, personable, realistic and absolutely gorgeous. If I could only read one comic book a month, it would probably be Ms. Marvel.

Ms. Marvel has been shot! And in her weakened state, she reaches out to her friend Bruno and reveals her true identity, shapeshifting back into Kamala Khan – but that has the added side effect of healing her bullet wound! She’s fine! Kamala comes clean to Bruno about everything, and he helps her protect her identity when the police arrive, responding to Bruno’s 9-1-1 call. Kamala puts on a sleep mask and announces herself as the new Ms. Marvel, complete with powers and the day saved!

After the cops leave, Bruno tells Kamala that he’s worried about his little brother and what he may have gotten involved in that led him to trying to rob the Circle Q. Kamala insists that she be able to investigate, and goes home to put together a costume so that she really can become the new Ms. Marvel! She heads to the bad guy’s hideout, run by a villain named ‘The Inventor’. She beats up some guards, beats up some mechanical spider-bots and eventually finds Bruno’s brother being held prisoner there in the basement – but the Inventor is there as well!

Comic Rating: 9/10 – Great.

I think I’m in love. There’s no other way to put it. Every issue of this new series has been an absolute delight. Kamala is just such a wonderful young woman, equal parts classically heroic and fascinatingly unique. She embraces the hero who has more personal problems than super-villain problems, so when she does want to be a hero, including showing off her powers, talking about making a costume and fighting thugs, she’s just so real. (Also, her costume is made out of a burkini, how neat is that?) Even when she’s just herself, talking with her friend Bruno, she’s just such a fun, enjoyable person.

Adorable

Ms. Marvel is a great comic, and four issues in, it has not let me down yet. It’s one of the best introductions I’ve ever read for a new, young superhero. I’m a little wary of an upcoming Wolverine guest appearance, but I suppose this is the world we live in. I hope for the best for Kamala Khan, and I hope this series gets to live for a long, long time. Everybody who loves comics should be reading Ms. Marvel.

Seriously, if you’re not reading this book, and Ms. Marvel gets cancelled, then so help me…

Nightwing #30

Nightwing #30
Writers: Tim Seeley and Tom King
Artists: Javier Garron, Jorge Lucas and Mikel Janin

I give this ‘Grayson’ thing a year, maybe two. Personally, I think DC is gearing up to put Nightwing in Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice, and they want to be able to smack a new Nightwing #1 on the shelves when that movie comes out, so they came up with something for Dick to do out of costume for two years. That’s not to say Grayson is going to be a bad comic. Maybe it’ll be great! But I don’t believe for a second that this is Dick Grayson’s longterm fate.

In a tough, no-holds-barred sparring match between Bruce and Dick in the Batcave, Bruce tells Dick all about this mission he has for him. Bruce needs Dick to stay ‘dead’ so that he can infiltrate Spyral, an evil spy organization that is trying to uncover superhero secret identities. Bruce needs Dick to go off grid and infiltrate Spyral so that they can take it down before the group brings down all the superheroes. Dick is resistant at first, because he doesn’t want to hurt his family like this. They’re going to take his ‘death’ especially hard. But eventually, Dick agrees to do it.

Later, we see him doing good deeds around the world, while he narrates about how his life has changed over the years. His work gets him noticed by Spyral, and he’s recruited by the new Helena Bertinelli.

Comic Rating: 8/10 – Very Good.

I fully admit that my review is probably totally biased. As regular readers will know, I’m a huge Robin fan, so an issue devoted to Bruce and Dick being badass together is right up my alley, likewise the big internal monologue that Dick goes through about his life, his time as a superhero and how all of that has led him to this. I was eating this stuff up. The fight between the two is pretty brutal, and tonally kind of weird. Batman never deviated from his clearly scripted explanation of Spyral and the danger they represent, while Dick was kind of whiny about not wanting to do it. Since when does Dick Grayson refuse something that’s asked of him?

Of course, I still don’t understand why they can’t let some of the Bat-family in on the secret. Alfred, maybe Tim; they could definitely keep the secret. But whatever. That’s not a big deal.

I’m definitely going to give Grayson a try. There was a moment in this issue that really spoke to me. It’s towards the end, when Dick is recounting his life, and how it has led him to this moment.

He’s Batman. The night is his.

I read that panel and thought to myself, “Yeah, Dick Grayson is a former Batman!” How many characters can say that? Who else in the entirety of comics can say that they are a Batman? (And don’t say Azrael, since he was clearly an impostor and a failure). That panel gives me faith that Grayson might actually be kind of cool. He really is the perfect sort of character to be dropped into an ‘international man of mystery’ role. And it speaks to what makes Dick, and Robin, so cool in the first place: Everybody knows that Batman is one of the coolest, most badass and awesome superheroes in the world, both the comic world and the real world; well Robin was hand-picked by Batman to be his partner and successor. Robin is the one character in the world trained by Batman to be just as damn good as Batman.

So maybe Grayson will be a fun comic after all!

The comics I review in my Hench-Sized reviews are just the usual comics I pick up from my local shop any given week, along with a few impulse buys I might try on a whim. So if there are any comics or series you’d like me to review each week, let me know in the comments!