6 Villains I Want and 6 I Don’t Want in the New Spider-Man Movies
I would not have chosen the Lizard for The Amazing Spider-Man movie reboot. But then I didn’t have the unenviable task of picking a new super-villain to star in the reboot after most of the big names had been used in the three previous films. Who else were the writers supposed to pick? Well I’m glad you asked!
Spider-Man has the second best Rogue’s Gallery in all of comics (behind Batman). He’s got smart villains, bruiser villains, small-time crooks and big-time megalomaniacs! So with this new Spider-Man franchise being launched, who would I choose for the upcoming sequels?
It’s kind of obvious
OK, so I’d pick Venom. And probably even Green Goblin and Doctor Octopus. What can I say, they’re some of the best, coolest and most cinematic of Spider-Man’s villains. And I wouldn’t bat an eye if the new franchise wanted to use them. But you and I both know that Spider-Man has many, many more foes to choose from. So being the comic book geek that I am, I’ve put together a list of the 6 villains I want to see in future movies, and 6 that I don’t. Not all of Spidey’s bad guys are made for the big screen.
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Want:
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6. Rhino
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Rhino smash!
Rhino is big, he’s brutal and he’s the kind of villain who could bring down an entire skyscraper! If you thought Lizard was a good physical match for Spider-Man, the Rhino could tear up the entire city, not just Peter’s high school. Granted, he’s usually played as a brainless moron, but there’s no reason that has to be held over into the movie. Turn Rhino into a vicious, professional mercenary-type, one who chooses to get this super-powered upgrade. Rhino would make a great henchman/crony.
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5. Kraven the Hunter
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He sits like a boss
For the most part, the villains should shy away from guys dressed up in bright, colorful costumes. It works in the comics, but not so much live action. Kraven is one character who could dress like a normal person – at least starting out. He’s a big game hunter who decides to hunt the most dangerous prey: Spider-Man! Maybe even for a reality TV show. Kraven could start out kind of normal, but after he keeps failing to kill Spidey, he just goes crazier until he totally gives in to his primal, feral fury!
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4. Electro
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I don’t think electricity is actually yellow
The power to shoot electricity from his fingertips is Electro’s stock in trade, and I think it would look fantastic on the big screen. Throwing lightning bolts, controlling the entire electrical grid of Manhattan, and shocking Spidey like a million Tasers are just a few of the things Electro can bring to the table. Electro’s always been sidelined with some bad costumes over the years, but if you put enough pros at the drawing board, surely one of them can come up with a good new look. Electro could be a powerful and flashy villain, but one who is still grounded in realism.
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3. Scorpion
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Green is the true color of evil
Scorpion is one of my all-time favorite Spider-Man villains, mostly because I used to love scorpions as a little kid. They’re just awesome bugs! Claws, tail, stinger; they’re little monster machines! Scorpion was just a normal man until he was hired to turn himself into a superhero in order to fight and stop Spider-Man. But that tends to drive a man insane. I think that’d make for a nice movie. A guy is turned into a superhero in order to compete with Spider-Man, only for everything to go wrong as he goes bad. Then Spidey gets to be the true hero in the end.
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2. Black Cat
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Cleavage everywhere
The appearance of Catwoman in this year’s Batman movie might put a hamper on cat-themed lady thieves in black outfits. But Black Cat, with her fur-lined costume and white-haired sexiness, can top a dramatic Anne Hathaway any day. Black Cat has fun as a costumed thief. She loves what she does, and the audience will love her. Plus she’s perfect for a romantic love triangle. Peter may only have eyes for Gwen Stacy, but what’s he going to do when Spider-Man starts attracting the attention of a beauty like the Black Cat? For once, Spidey should be the focus of a love triangle, not Mary Jane.
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1. Shocker
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The ultimate bro-fist
Shocker is quite possibly my favorite Spider-Man villain ever. Of all the big names and dangerous threats, Shocker’s working class thuggery has always appealed to me. He’s not a maniac, he’s not insane. He’s just a crook who was smart enough to invent his vibro-shock gauntlets, a pair of weapons that help him bust into safes and bank vaults. The costume is just a suit he needs to wear to protect himself from the strength of the gauntlets. Shocker is one of the only villains out there who doesn’t have some mega revenge beef against Spider-Man. He’s just worried about the job and making money. Shocker would be a perfect minor villain to use in a movie. He wouldn’t carry the whole show, but he could be used in the beginning during an establishing action scene. Like a running gag throughout the series, or throughout just one movie. An average joe super-villain, somebody Spidey can mock and web-up just to show off. Make it happen, Hollywood!
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Don’t Want
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6. Hobgoblin
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Orange is far more menacing than green
Hobgoblin, no matter who is behind the mask, has a lot of good traits. He’s scary, he’s sometimes crazy and he’s got a great ghoulish look. But he’s still just a knock-off of the Green Goblin. Literally. In the comics, the guy found some old Green Goblin gear and just dyed it a different color. The last thing this new Spider-Man series needs is a super-villain who is just a cheap knock-off to the chief villain of the first series. So Hobby is out!
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5. Morbius
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Team Bella
Morbius is the ultimate emo vampire loser. He’s not even a real vampire, he’s a weak facsimile. And let’s not even get into his desire for “plasma” from the weak-willed 90s cartoon. Pass.
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4. Mysterio
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He’s like a weird-looking magician
Keep that damn fish bowl head off the big screen. Some people love the look, but I’ve never cared for Mysterio. He’s a former special effects wizard who turned to crime. But all of his magic is fake, that’s the entire point. And he takes the ‘wizard’ part seriously. He’s flamboyant and colorful, neither of which would work with the new realistic, dark take on Spider-Man. Plus c’mon! Fish bowl head!
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3. Hydro-Man
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He’s all wet
The poor man’s Sandman. They did it once and they did it fine in Spider-Man 3. But I wouldn’t bring Sandman back for the new series, so why his non-union, Mexican equivalent?
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2. Vulture
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Get off his lawn, Spider-Man!
Did you know that the Vulture was going to be the villain of Spider-Man 4? I think they had John Malkovich lined up to play him. Why? Because Vulture is a decrepit and senile old man in a flying suit. Nobody wants to see Spider-Man beating up on a fragile old man. Even if he’s played by a crazy bastard like Malkovich. Vulture may be a classic villain, but he should stay on the comic page.
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1. Chameleon
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Whiteface is not cool
The Chameleon was the first super-villain that Spider-Man ever fought, way back in Amazing Spider-Man #1. He’s a super spy with the ability to transform into other people, basically a master of disguise. You know who else is a master of disguise? Everybody. Every movie spy worth their salt is a master of disguise. And Mystique, a real shape-shifter, was the star of every single X-Men film. But if you’re going to be a super-villain fighting Spider-Man, a master of disguise just isn’t enough. So forget Chameleon’s history. He doesn’t have the chops for the big screen.
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Which villains would you like to see in future movies? Are there a lot of Boomerang fans out there? How were my choices? Am I on the money or a complete fool? Let me know in the comments!
Posted on July 5, 2012, in Comics, Lists of Six!, Marvel, Movies, Spider-Man and tagged The Amazing Spider-Man. Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.
Henchman-4-Hire 
I think you’re pretty on point! Loved both lists!
In this gritty new world of ours, we need a grittier villain. Momentarily ignoring the fact that Marvel regained the rights recently, I think the Punisher would be a brilliant foil to Spider-Man.
His background is far more tragic than that of Spider-Man, and he has yet to learn one of the key lessons Peter learned in the Amazing Spider-Man: That random vigilantism can sometimes do more harm than good, and that pursuing a vendetta isn’t the same as assuming the responsibility of power.
Peter might sympathise with the Punisher’s tragic origin, but he would be driven to stop the Punisher from killing. Throw the Shocker or another villain in, and I think it could be a tasty cocktail for a good story.
It would present a brilliant philosophical dichotymy between a villain who doesn’t KNOW he’s a villain, and one who DOES.
Bold suggestion, Babe! And Marvel has gotten back the rights to the Punisher movie license. So it could happen!
Should have known you’d pick Shocker as number 1. He’s always been one of my favorites, even if that is the result of that wonderful kid-think that leads to thoughts like ‘he’s like Spiderman but yellow and with lightning hands’. I wish someone would do something great with Shocker, even Spectacular Soiderman gave up and murged him with another Spidey villain. I guess thats the price you pay for having a working man’s priorities in the supervillain game.
That said, I’m almost surprised Scorpion made it as high as he did without mention of his Willie Lowman issues and detective background (was that just in the animated series?)
I don’t know if the Willy Loman stuff was in the comics, but he did start out as a detective. But that lasted half an issue until he became all super-villain.
I’ve never really read any Scorpion stories, except Dan Slott’s most recent. I just have memories of one episode of Spiderman: TAS where they showed of Gargan’s detective skills even as the Scorpion. That’s abnormally good writing for 90s Marvel animation. I wonder if anyone else used his detective background.
Also now that I think of it, I actually think Chameleon could really fit the tone of the Amazing series. They’re…kind of light and gritty, if that makes any sense. There’s just enough suspension of disbelief to help him out and just enough room for serious terrorism or psychological warfare to keep the focus on New York and or the character of Peter Parker rather than Spiderman. Not to mention that he has natural ties to the spy games stories that have been traditionally associated with Peter’s parents.
I know that Chameleon has not always felt like a first class villain. He’s clearly one of those old members of the rogues gallery who haven’t held on to their relevance fully. But watch The Dark Knight and see how the best superhero movie of all time manages to completely do away with any conception of the Villain actively and successfully engaging the hero. Then I suggest reading the Chameleon story from Amazing Spiderman 602-604. There’s plenty wrong with those issues but they are a convincing argument for how the Chameleon can work, in my opinion.
It’s not that I don’t think Chameleon wouldn’t fit in the world of the Amazing Spider-Man, or couldn’t cause a lot of mischief, I just don’t think a big screen adaptation should focus on a dude in a white mask who can pose as other dudes. It’s not big screen enough.
I know, and to some degree I would have to agree, but I definitely point to The Dark Knight as an example of a movie that got a big impact out of a guy with a white face and no powers. Now that has a lot of factors that probably wouldn’t be in play in a Spiderman sequel but it could happen. The biggest issue is probably just that there wouldn’t even really be one good fight in the movie between Spidey and anyone significant. It does feel easier to have a good action scene between Batman and henchmen than Spiderman and Henchmen.
The only other argument I got, and mind you I’m arguing (to use an overly strong word) only to be cheerfully contrarian, is that there’s ample comics precedent for there to be a Chameleon and Kraven team-up. I’m always skeptical of adding an extra villain but that one could really work. Plus my own Dark Knight argument turns against me at this point.
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