The latest issue of Kaine’s ongoing series (still weird to say it) is an entertaining one-off story that gets a little too big for its own good. Our hero saves the day in glorious fashion, but brief cameos by Iron Man, President Obama and the new SHIELD (featuring Fury Jr. and Coulson!) create a magnitude that is more jarring than exciting. If writer Chris Yost wanted to go this big this soon with his fledgling series, he should have given more time for the story to grow. Perhaps a two-parter.

Scarlet Spider #5

While this done-in-one story doesn’t feel rushed, it definitely feels like we’ve jumped into the middle of the action-packed story and are expected to catch up. And the flashbacks don’t provide nearly enough material to help in that regard.

Comic rating: 4/5: Good.

There’s also a new artist, Neil Edwards, who while not as good as regular artist Ryan Stegman, easily holds his own in the action department, and looks similar enough to Stegman that the change isn’t a problem. Although he’ll have to do, since Stegman got the bump up to the Fantastic Four. We won’t have him around much longer.

If nothing else, this issue is a fantastic look into Kaine’s mindset when it comes to being a superhero. He’s got a lot of great character moments throughout that show he’s not a goody two shoes like Spider-Man. He’s definitely an anti-hero, though the series hasn’t pushed him over the edge just yet. I’m sure it wants to maintain some level of decency in its protagonist. Still, he’s a lot of fun to read when he really lets the bad guys have it. And while I suppose I’d like to see Kaine interact with the rest of the Marvel Universe in time, this issue just gets too big too fast, but doesn’t do anything interesting with those high stakes – unless next issue follows up on some of these story ideas.

Join me after the jump for a full synopsis and review.

We open with some pretty cool action, as the swinging Scarlet Spider chases down a couple of gun-wielding terrorists in a speeding van.

What the hell happened to the van that’s flying through the air and on fire?

He tosses one guy out the window back into oncoming traffic, then grabs the wheel and forces the van to crash. When the driver tells Kaine to let go, Kaine simply replies, “No.” I’m telling you, he’s quite badass in this issue. Once the van crashes, Kaine grabs the injured driver and demands to know the location of a bomb!

As I said, we’ve jumped right into the middle of the story.

We make a quick cut to the University of Houston, where the villain Ranier (a guy in a suit) and his domestic terrorist group the Watchdogs, kill a security guard at the Texas Center for Superconductivity. It’s safe to say that they have the bomb at the university. But Scarlet Spider can’t seem to get this information out of the thug he stopped, who isn’t talking no matter how many eyeballs Kaine threatens to pluck out.

Officer Layton arrives at the scene and points a gun at Scarlet, telling him to let the guy go. Kaine warns Layton about threatening him, but still lets the guy go. Layton recognizes him as a guy named Menkin, who has been arrested a few times for violence against illegal immigrants. Then Scarlet Spider reveals that he’s not quite done with Menkin.

Scarlet Spider: Casual killer of families

They get a location out of Menkin, because next Layton and the Scarlet Spider as speeding through town in the officer’s patrol car. Layton lays into Kaine for hurting Menkin and threatening his family. Kaine can’t believe the officer is so naive that he’d want to play it cozy when there’s a nuclear bomb ready to go off! Kaine wants to gather up their group of friends and get the hell out of Houston. Though Kaine uses a few more colorful words. The guy swears like a sailor. Layton can’t believe a superhero like Kaine would want to just take off.

Kaine asks for the backstory, and we get the flashback to what has set all of this in motion. Ranier and the Watchdogs are a hate group who don’t like illegals, homosexuals and the usual. They plan to set off a bomb in Houston to prove their crazy point, but fortunately one of the Watchdogs got scared and tipped off the police. Now everybody’s scrambling to try and find this bomb before it goes off. And since Layton personally knows Houston’s only superhero – the Scarlet Spider – Layton thought he could help.

Never believe everything you hear on the news

Lot’s of little comedy like that in the issue. Earlier, Layton said the phrase ‘for pete’s sake’, and Kaine told him to never say that name. So a lot of character-based humor that fans of the character and the concept – like me – will absolutely love. I also kind of like how Kaine didn’t choose the name ‘Scarlet Spider’. Instead, it was created by the media, and he even dislikes it. That’s the exact same story from when Ben Reilly, the original Scarlet Spider (and fellow clone), was given the name. So neat parallel.

The duo arrive at the University of Houston and find the dead bodies, leading them to a radiation lab. Ranier and his goons were looking for something, but it’s clear they’ve already got what they came for and left – setting off a radiation leak in the process.

Radiation is good for spider-men

Outside, Layton telephones his superiors while Scarlet Spider insists that the bad guys have gotten away, that it’s all over – until they get shot at by a bunch of Watchdogs who stayed behind. Scarlet Spider and Layton make quick work of the group, and this time its Layton who shoves a gun in one of their faces and demands to know the location of the bomb.

We then cut to the FBI, since Layton made that call. This is where everything starts to get out of hand. Now granted, there’s a nuclear bomb about to go off in Houston, so obviously people higher up the ladder than Officer Layton and the Scarlet Spider should be worrying about this. So for now, this kind of makes sense. But it’s going to get worse in a few pages. We only learned of the nuclear bomb a few pages ago. So while we, the reader, are struggling to keep up and following the adventures of our hero, the story is suddenly spiraling all the way up to SHIELD and Iron Man. Can you see what I mean about reaching a magnitude that’s a little out of control? More on this later.

Because now we get to enjoy the first official appearances of Nick Fury Jr. and Agent Phil Coulson! They premiered at the end of the Battle Scars mini-series a few weeks ago, and now Scarlet Spider gets the distinction of featuring them as actual characters!

At least for the length of one bad quip

Though the fact that Daisy Johnson (who looks an awful lot like Maria Hill) is the head of SHIELD and not Fury just seems kind of weird. If they were going to go to all that trouble of introducing the black Nick Fury, why shoot themselves in the foot by not having him as the head of SHIELD? Why go to all that trouble only to back off at the very end?

At least a Scarlet Spider/Iron Man team-up sounds kind of cool…

Meanwhile, Layton and the Scarlet Spider crash through a fence at the William P. Hobby Airport, which a quick Google search reveals is an actual place. So if you live in Houston and you read Scarlet Spider, I bet you’re having a blast.

Scarlet webs up a bunch of guys, jumps into a plane about to take off and confronts Ranier about the bomb – but he doesn’t get any answers as Ranier swallows a bullet. Fanatic suicide! Though before he killed himself, Ranier said the bomb would go off in 20 minutes! Layton arrives at the plane, and Scarlet Spider again insists that they gather their friends and just leave town. Layton lets Kaine have it, about what it means to be a hero.

Then Kaine magically ‘remembers’ that he can talk to spiders. Since when?

Of course! The answer lies in this magical super-power I have that I’ve never mentioned before and is specifically suited to the task at hand!

I’ve read both Spider-Island, where this new version of Kaine debuted, and every issue of this series. Since when can he talk to spiders? Though this is all sounding suspiciously like ‘The Other’, a Spider-Man story from back in the early 00s. Basically Marvel had this big tale about how Peter Parker had some totemic spider origin, and they gave Peter a ton of new powers – which were promptly ignored by other writers. However, Kaine seems to have all these ‘Other’ powers now. From the organic web-shooters to the wrist spikes to the talking to spiders thing. So that’s…interesting.

Somehow, Kaine starts ‘listening’ to all the spiders spread out across Houston and they point him towards the bomb in the Houston Underground, a series of pedestrian walkways and shopping areas underneath the city. Again, this is a total Houston tourism guide. Scarlet Spider and Layton race to the scene.

Meanwhile, we check in on Iron Man – who says he won’t make it in time – and President Obama.

I bet they say that about New York City every time a super-villain pops up

See what I mean about magnitude? This is huge! They’re telling the President that Houston, Texas is about to be blown up with a nuclear bomb. And while yeah, they have Iron man and SHIELD responding, but this is a Scarlet Spider comic! Are we going to expect such massive, world-altering stories from such a small title? It’s like the book is getting a bit too big for its britches. What would have happened if the Watchdogs planted the bomb before Scarlet Spider just happened to set up shop in Houston? This is a pretty big plot to swallow, and it’s not going down easy.

Fortunately, Yost keeps the focus directly on Scarlet Spider and Layton as they find the bomb – but neither of them knows how to disarm a bomb. Layton calls his husband to say goodbye, and then Kaine just shrugs and tears all the wiring out at the last second. The day is saved!

I’ve seen worse ways to defuse a bomb

Actually, that was a pretty cool way to end the story. Scarlet Spider isn’t some great hero who can disarm a nuclear bomb in time. He’s the kind of guy who just says “F&%$ it” and does whatever he thinks might work. I don’t mind that ripping out the wires actually worked to disarm a bomb. This is comics. Suspension of disbelief is implied.

The bomb squad show up and find Layton sitting next to the bomb. Scarlet Spider has activated his cloaking device so that nobody can see him, and he whispers to Layton that the guy better get a promotion for this. I should hope so! As far as anyone knows, Patrolman Layton single-handedly tracked down the nuclear bomb and safely disarmed it. All on his lonesome. This threat was so huge that not only was Iron Man racing to the scene, but they told the President that Houston was lost. This is a pretty big deal! Layton would be hailed as a hero the world over! He’d get invited to the White House!

So I can only hope that next issue addresses this in some way. Hero Cop Saves Houston from Nuclear Death! Hello!? And even if he gives some of the credit to the Scarlet Spider, that’s a big deal too! None of the other superheroes saved Houston from a nuclear bomb. Scarlet Spider would get a ton of media coverage too.

You can see why I think this issue got a little too big.

Then it ends with Iron Man flying over Houston and Coulson telling him that the problem has been resolved.

Thanks Iron Man, but your cameo is no longer needed

That just reads kind of awkwardly. Plus we were denied our Scarlet Spider/Iron Man team-up! Still, it was a fun read. The Scarlet Spider/Layton scenes were great, and Scarlet’s attitude about being a hero is hugely entertaining. But I just think this issue escalated itself into levels that this small-scale book can’t handle. The ramifications of this victory should reverberate throughout the entire Marvel Universe, and Scarlet Spider isn’t ready for that. It got too big, too soon.