Yearly Archives: 2011
The Rise of Lady Stilt-Man
There is no dorkier character in all of comicdom than Stilt-Man. Here is a super-villain whose only real ‘power’ is that he invented a robotic suit with giant, telescoping legs. The legs let him raise up to the top floors of skyscrapers, bypassing all security by just breaking into a super high window. Now that’s creative thievery. And he’s been around for decades, returning again and again to battle all manner of superheroes in pursuit of riches.
Unfortunately, he’s dead.
Stilt-Man is gone to that great super-villain volcano lair in the sky. Brutally killed by the Punisher with a rocket launcher. Stilt-Man has been around since the 1960s! He was one of Daredevil’s earliest foes, debuting in Daredevil #8! In fact, I have a copy of that very issue framed on my wall. My brother got it for me for my birthday. Kudos to him. But one of the great things about Marvel Comics and their writers is that they are in on the joke. They know just how awesome Stilt-Man was. So rather than just let him die and fade away, they threw a wake! All of Stilt-Man’s low-level super-villain friends threw him a wake at the Bar-With-No-Name – which the Punisher crashed and tried to poison everyone.
Then in a recent anniversary issue of Iron Man, he and Spider-Man teamed up to take on a group of technological cultists who had taken to worshiping the late, great Stilt-Man! Marvel has done so much with Stilt-Man’s legacy, but the greatest of all is the new queen of dorky super-villains: Lady Stilt-Man!
She's going to squash that menace Spider-Man like a bug!
When Fairy Tales Became the New Hollywood
I’m not entirely sure how this started, but Hollywood is absolutely in love with making gritty, realistic versions of fairy tales and other fantasy stories. There was that Red Riding Hood movie a few years ago, but I never saw it. I don’t think it even succeeded at the box office. I know the Alice in Wonderland movie did well, but that was relying on 3D and Johnny Depp-style, not really the gritty retelling. So what is possibly driving these movies? Did someone have an idea and now they just can’t stop the momentum?
First up, we have Snow White and the Huntsman:
So…uh…what?
Snow White re-imagined as some kind of epic war movie? Snow White was definitely wearing armor and wielding a sword at one point. And clearly the Huntsman is supposed to be some kind of action hero now. What did he do in the original fairy tale? Just wussed out on killing Snow White, right? I gotta say, that looked kinda badass. Who doesn’t love a good sword and sorcery tale? And if you can cling to a known entity like ‘Snow White’, why the hell not?
I can understand the ‘why’, I’m just not sure I understand the hopes of success. When she wasn’t in armor, Snow White seemed to do a lot of wandering around some random forest. And I’m pretty sure the love story aspect is written in stone. So…I guess grit and badassery are all its got going for it.
Because they sure as hell downplayed the Seven Dwarves! They were barely in one frame of that trailer at the 1:13 mark! That’s the real travesty.
Another new movie coming out in Neverland, a prequel to Peter Pan:
If you didn’t notice Anthony Hopkins in the trailer, he plays Smee. So I believe that means we can consider this a prequel to Hook.
Everybody loves prequels, right? They’re still very popular. The origins of Captain Hook and Peter Pan could be a nifty idea. I suppose all those hundreds of other Peter Pan stories left us wondering where Neverland and everybody came from, right? Because it’s always a good idea to reveal the secrets and mysteries of magical and mysterious things. Pulling back the curtain was the best thing that ever happened to the Wizard of Oz.
As is the case with most trailers, those two actually make the movies look good. Trailers are an art form these days, and I’m definitely falling for those two. But I just can’t help but feel that they’re not going to be very good movies. What do you all think?
Also, I’m pretty sure there are a half-dozen other Snow White and Peter Pan movies coming out alongside these two…
Review: Calling All Robins
For my 200th post at Henchman-4-Hire, I want ALL the Robins! But 200 posts, that’s a pretty big achievement, right? I hope so, and I hope to write 200 more. I’m really enjoying blogging, and we’ve definitely increased our readership since the site opened. I take that as a good sign. Though I wish we saw more comments. C’mon everybody! Fire off a comment or two after some of my posts. Tell me what you think. Tell me what else you want to read!
Calling ALL the Robins!
At any rate, to celebrate the 200th post I’ve picked a very special comic book to review: Batman: The Brave and the Bold #13. It’s a comic book based on a now cancelled TV show, but it’s special because it’s the very first time, in all of comicdom, that all of the Robins team up in one adventure in order to help Batman!
Calling all Robins…Batman Dies at Dawn!
How nifty is that?
Comic rating: 3/5: Alright.
Not very nifty as a story, but wonderfully nifty as a concept. Longtime readers of this blog will know that I’m a HUGE Robin fan. I love the character even more than Batman. So any Robin-focused story is cool by me. So I figured it would be a fun idea to spend my 200th post talking about a comic book that revels in ultimate Robin goodness. The story is flimsy, the characterizations are sparse, but dammit if this isn’t a comic where Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Damian and even Carrie Kelly team up in order to save the Batman!
That’s good comic books, people.
Review: Ultimate Comics: All-New Spider-Man #4
The new Ultimate Spider-Man series slows down with issue #4 so that we can all catch up to what came before: the death of Peter Parker. Miles Morales has his spider-powers, so now it’s time to find out how and why he became the new Spider-Man. On the one hand, it makes perfect sense to tie his decisions directly into the death of the first Spider-Man. But on the other hand, this makes for a slow issue filled with moments we’ve already seen before. And it doesn’t give us any new insight or surprises to go along with those moments.
Ultimate Comics: Spider-Man #4
But a last page cliffhanger promises some excitement for issue #5.
Comic rating: 3/5: Alright.
The low rating does not reflect poor quality, but instead the lack of story. By all means, this issue is written quite well and Miles continues to be a compelling protagonist. But as I said, this issue is just a retread of everything we’ve seen before. The story of Miles Morales has finally caught up to where Peter Parker’s Ultimate Spider-Man series left off. So this issue is basically just a paint-by-numbers look at what Miles was up to in between Peter’s death and his fight with the Kangaroo from Ultimate Fallout #4.
We don’t see any character beyond Miles and Ganke and we still don’t have his black and red Spider-Man costume. Though this issue does mark the start of Miles’ first-person narration thought balloons. That might liven things up from here on out.
Batman Has Never Been More Adorable
Than in this massive picture of Wayne Manor by artist Les McClaine. It’s an intricate picture of Batman (with a little help from Robin and others) repelling an assault on Wayne Manor and the Batcave by all of his worst villains! Click the picture to expand, and visit McClaine’s blog for an even bigger version!
Click to enlarge
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